Project: Socialize (Chapters 1-197)

93. Reconcile

Later that morning, I finally realized what I did as my sanity slowly returned. Therefore, for the whole Saturday, I didn't speak to Loriana out of embarrassment. Because of that, I was constantly bothered by Luna's inevitable fate. The torment that was brought with knowing her future death led to a loss in appetite on my end and caused me to feel extremely lethargic as I was unable to raise my spirits. The only thing that I could muster was a deep sigh as I sat there on the living room couch and merely stared blankly at the television screen as comedy shows were being played. Despite the numerous laughter from the crowd that was watching the show live, I didn't feel a single bit amused.

At night, I turned and tossed in my own bed, unable to sleep. Whenever I closed my eyes, Luna's smile would appear and her skin and flesh would slowly peel off, revealing her skeleton. That frightened me greatly, making me fear closing my eyes to sleep. Like I had expected, the only way I could fall asleep was by sleeping with Loriana. However, after what had happened that morning, I was afraid to knock on her door. Therefore, I laid in my bed and stared at the ceiling.

At maybe 1:00 A.M., there was a soft knock on my door. Knowing that it was Loriana, I was reluctant to answer it, but I was deathly in need of her presence. Therefore, I took a deep breath and gathered enough courage before I opened the door.

She was standing there in the hallway with a night gown on. This outfit of her's was probably the result of what had happened in the morning. However, that wasn't the main reason for her visit. She stood there, head low while standing apologetically before the door to my room.

"You... can't sleep?" she asked me.

I stared at her golden eyes, then allowing my gaze to shift to her long blond hair and mature body. I thought back on what I did in the morning, feeling a great guilt building up within me. However, I understood that what had occurred in the morning was ultimately the materialization of my desire to be closer to her into the form of action. I still feel the same way at the moment, so... I really can't say I've repented. Rather, I hoped that she would allow me to lay by her side once again so that I could fall asleep. I know... It's pretty selfish of me.

"Is something the matter recently?" she then asked as she stared into my eyes with great concern.

I nodded. "I promised someone that I wouldn't tell anyone... Not even you."

"Is that so?" She nodded her head. "Then you don't need to tell me... Is... is sleeping beside me the only way you can be comforted?"

I nodded my head in shame.

"..." She stared at me, thoughts flashing through her head as she considered her options. After weighing what her choices were, she sighed and turned around to her bedroom door. Then, she held the door open and looked over at me. "D-don't do anything weird..." she whispered as she blushed.

I slowly followed her into her room, and that night, I was once again able to lay by her side. Like the morning, I brought my arms around her as I slept, but that night, she laid with her back facing towards me, probably in order to prevent what had happened this morning from ever occurring. Even though I missed the softness of her chest, being able to hold her and feel the warmth of her body was more than enough to lull me into my state of slumber.

The following morning, I opened my eyes before Loriana did. It would appear that she had turned her body while sleeping because her face was a few centimeters from mine. I could even feel her soft breathing on my face. When she opened her eyes a few minutes later, she blushed as she saw my face not too far from her's and immediately sat up. However, after realizing that nothing has happened, she let out a sigh of relief and went on with her day.

On Sunday, she seemed more lenient of me than the day before, probably recognizing the fact that she's my only source of solace and comfort. Therefore, she allowed me to remain close by her side, often times letting me put my arms around her as we lived the day out.