Love and Other Diseases (bxb)

Chapter Three

Just as a warning, there's insensitive language in this chapter.

-

When I opened my door to walk to school, Blake was on the other side. Standing on my porch. Wearing sunglasses, as usual.

As if trying to kill me.

Disturbing.

"Jake." He stared me dead in the eyes. Through his sunglasses.

"Yes?"

"I googled what a catamite is."

Wait. What. "Oh my God. Why?"

"Because your friend told me that's what you wanted to make me! Dude..." he darted in close and pulled down his sunglasses. He looked left and right. He took a deep breath. "Dude—"

I took a step back and closed the door in his face.

You know when you kind of just look at a situation and say, 'nope'?

Well, yeah.

Nope.

A rapid knock at my door. Of course.

"Dude!" His irritating voice was muffled through my front door, but, unfortunately, I could still hear him speaking. "Dude, why did your friend say you wanna have buttsex with me? That's weird, man! I'm not like... I'm not like a fag, you know?"

There it was.

"I need you to recognize that by slamming the door in your face I was giving you the opportunity to not say that part," I explained. "Ah, well. They were probably wondering why I don't like you. They probably thought I was being a jerk unnecessarily. Well, now they know."

They, meaning my friends. I whipped out my phone to shoot them a text.

Me: Blake the mistake dropped the f word. Now you see?

Their responses came in pretty quickly.

Kay: dude, ouch

Christi: what?? Fuck him man, this is the twenty-first century. People should not fucking be using that terminology anymore.

Ben: he said fuck?

Me: He said fag, Ben. Stop pretending like you're so straight that you don't pick up on LGBTQ+ issues.

Ben: fuck you man, I'm straight. And i get your gay shit ok? ... im just not gay. At all. Like ever you know?

Oh, Ben. Ben, Ben, Ben. Sweet, clueless Ben.

... Anyway.

Right. There was still knocking. Oh, and I needed to go to school.

Ben: not that i dont respect you being gay, i just am not. but i love you man, not in a gay way, but i totally can understand your issues and shit

Me: Ben, you're texting like someone who's panic-talking to get through an awkward conversation. But you can revise your texts, so I don't know what's wrong with you. Anyway, goodbye, Blake is knocking at my door.

Kay: You were just talking to him?

Kay: You mean you aren't walking with him rn? Why did u talk to him and now he's knocking on ur door? That's weird??

Kay: jake?,

I decided to put my phone away. "Blake, please leave, you're going to wake up my family. My cat doesn't like loud noises."

"Your cat is your family?"

"What? No? I have parents and a sister. You're my neighbor, don't you know this?"