The meaning of living| Yoonmin

12

I sit there for a couple minute in slience.

"Just think about it." He says.

He stands up and walks away. I stare out into the lake. I hold my legs close to my chest. I think about what Mr. Kim said. Yoongi was comfortable enough with me to argue with me. And he likes me. He's cute I'll admit but I just can't do relationships. I can't stand being touched, or kissed, or the thing most people want in a relationships. Sex. Most people in a relationships want to have sex with the person they're in the relationships with.

But I can't because of my uncle. I jump whenever someone touches me. I pull my knees to my chest because it gave me comfort after he would get done with me. I have trouble talking to people about personal things because my uncle told me every time 'This is just between us, no one needs to know. It's a secret and we don't tell people our secrets.' For 5 years I hear that. On every birthday, every special occasion, every holiday, every time my parents would go on date night, he would be there.

But I need to do something to make Yoongi feel better. I stand up and walk back into the hospital. I go back Into our room. I close the door and walk over to the bed, sitting down facing him. He looks down and his lap uneasy, playing with his fingers.

"Yoongi." I try to get his attention.

"Hm." He hums not looking up. "It was 5 years my uncle first did that to me." I say.

He looks up.

"5 years?" He asks.

I nod.

"How often?" He asks.

"Birthdays, holidays, special occasions, my parents date night every Friday night till they decided to get divorced 4 years ago." I explain.

"That's so horrible." He mutters.

"After they got divorced I started to see him only at parties. And I saw a lot more of him than my family did." I explain.

"Finally at my 14th birthday I got enough courage to tell me mom. She thought I was lying to get attention." Tears start falling down my face.

I wipe them away.

"I started cutting myself 1 year before then. When things got bad it was the only thing I could do that I had control over." I explain.

"Jimin that's horrible, I'm sorry." He apologizes.

"I've never told anyone this beside you, because no one would believe me." I say telling not to sob.

I move back and pull my legs to my chest.

"I believe you." He states.

I start full on crying. I can't help it anymore. Ive been holding back so many emotions since I got here and there all coming out now.

"Jimin please don't cry." He begs getting up.

He sits next to me putting his hand on my shoulder. I flinch away from him.

"Oh sorry." He apologizes.

I pull my hood up.

"I'll be back." He stands up from my bed.

He goes to the door and He walks out, closing the door behind him. I move up and cuddle with my bear like I would after he would finish. I hear running down the hall as I finally calm down. The door opens and Mr. Kim Bursts in.

"5 years!" He yells.

He walks further into the room.

"You never told me it was five years. I thought it was just one time." He yells

I pull my bear closer.

"Jimin you need to tell me why you kept this a secret." He demands.

"I didn't think you'd believe me." I whimper.

"Why wouldn't I believe you?" He asks.

"My mom didn't." I state.

"I'm not your mom Jimin, this is serious, we need to file a lawsuit or something." He threatens.

"Don't." I say sitting up quickly.

"Why?" He asks.

"Because I wasn't suppose to tell anybody." I mumbles.

"Jimin I'm calling your mother and we're getting this straightened out. I'm not letting him stay out there where he can do the same thing to other kids as you." He announces.

"She won't believe you." I mumble.

"I'll make sure she does Jimin. Trust me." He says.

I nod.

"Is there anything else you want to tell me?" He asks.

I shake my head.

"Okay." He says.

He walks out the door revealing Yoongi standing behind him. Yoongi closes the door.

"Why did you do that?" I ask.

"Because it needed to be done." He states.

"Great way to gain my trust." I yell tears falling down my face.

"I'm sorry, but it was 5 years. I saw how hurt you were and I didn't want you to hurt anymore. You need closure." He says.

"I need people to keep the secrets I tell them." I yell.

"You'll understand why I did it later." He says.

"To think I could trust you." I yell laying down and turning away from him.

"You can Trust me." He says.

"Oh really." I state sitting back up and looking at him.

"I tell you my biggest secret thinking I could trust you, but you run off and tell Mr. Kim about it." I point as tears pour down my face.

"He needed to know." He says.

"Now he's going to tell everybody about it. Everyone's going to know and everyone's going to look at me differently." I cry.

"I just want to be normal. But I can't because I'm here. And everyone will know." I add.

"Jimin." He says.

"Don't talk to me." I lay back down.

"Jimin." He begs.

"Just Leave me alone." I say.

And he does.