Avneil OS

How I feel about you (Part 2)

Avni's POV
The minute I saw Neil at Holi, I couldn't describe my feelings. My heart ached to be with him in his arms. I wanted to embrace him and let all the emotions I had hidden inside of me. But I knew I couldn't do that so I just stood there tearfully as Neil came to me in a drunk state. When he hugged me, I felt so at peace, so at bliss. I missed his masculine arms hugging me. I missed his warmth, his fragrance and presence. As we hugged, he expressed his emotions about missing me which just pained me so much to see how much I hurt him. I knew he loved me and I loved him but I never knew our love is unconditional. I hated leaving him but I knew I had to because if I didn't then Vidyut would tell the truth about Neela Maa's murder. How papaji unknowingly killed her. I couldn't get Neil to arrest his father especially a man like Papaji. Papaji was the one who didn't give a care about my sudden marriage to Neil. He accepted me wholeheartedly like a daughter. He instead thanked me for saving them from Dayavanti Mehta. I couldn't believe it. Normally I thought he would be mad due to me being married to his son suddenly but he wasn't. He supported me in this house and even supported me when he found out I was illegitimate. He is the one who changed my views on father and gave me the father love that I was craving since childhood. I used to think that all men are like Ashish Mehta weak and not trustworthy but Papaji was the opposite. He was strong enough to support me in that situation and always treated me like a daughter. I could never send him to jail especially when I lost my Neela Maa. Maa was my everything. She was my friend, mother, father and my guide. She always loved me and had another place in my heart. When she died, my world broke down. I lost my support system all because of a man who is obsessed with me. Her death was one of the most traumatic events I had in my life and I was glad I had Neil with me. He gave me the strength that I needed that time. He gave me the love that I wanted. When I first met him, I hated him. My tongue was sharp due to me being strong and that time my view was that all men are the same. I got so annoyed by him when he kept on asking me questions. Mr Question mark is what he is. Then when I found out that he is a police officer who is looking for Case 123, then I became alert. I hoped that I wouldn't see him again but due to my bad luck I did. I didn't know why I kept on bumping to him but I knew that as I continued seeing him we had some type of connection. He was obsessed with discovering who I was as he was a police officer trying to uncover a case. I continued being discreet but I never understood exactly why we kept meeting. Like why did he help me in Mahabhaleshwar. How did he always happen to save me from danger. Be it from the horse, getting shot from Aman, the gas leak, being slapped by Riya and the times he prevented me from falling. I knew that whenever we had those eye locks, a feeling was in there. Like I just get lost in those eyes. As I continued on knowing him, I realized that he wasn't like other police officers. He knew the difference between right and wrong and though a part of me felt like telling him about me, a part of me felt hesitant. From childhood I believed that everyone close to me left and I didn't want to lose Neil as a friend. We literally had a cat and mouse game. He kept on trying to chase and I kept on running away. Then it came to our marriage. I honestly didn't want to marry Neil but my mom didn't want me to just kill Dayavanti Mehta. She knew that Neil loved me and he would make me happy. Then I' did it for my mothers sake but a part of me was feeling immensely bad for doing this to Neil. I knew that after finding about our marriage, he is mad at me and he should be. I felt the worse for doing this to him but I knew that I had to do it for my revenge. The next few days of our marriage went on hectic as he was still mad at me and kept on failing my plans but Papaji was there to support me. Then came the day of the Pag Phera where I got the biggest surprise ever. Neil told me that he would bring me and my mom justice. He said the fault was of Dayavanti Mehta and not mine. That night when I hugged him, I felt so peaceful and strong. I got my strength to deal with this situation. He was always there for me, comforting me, saving me and caring for me. When I had nightmares he sacrificed his sleep. He got me to spill my feelings about my father. He broke down the walls that I built around my heart in childhood. When the bomb blast happened, I didn't know what happened but all I knew that I couldn't let Neil die. I don't know why I felt that way about him but I knew that I couldn't let him die. I supported him into finding out who is the culprit and supported him during Mishti and Juhi's stay. When I saw Mishti I saw a mini me which is why I decided to take her with me. That night when we consummated our relationship was one the best nights of my life. But little did I know that I was going to have a symbol of that night. My precious Mowgli. I hated how I kept him away from the world but I had to die to the fear of Vidyut. Do you know how it feels that you can't tell your son that you are his mother? It hurts me every day especially since I see Neil in him. Seeing Mowgli makes me miss Neil so much and I continued to live with his memories. Then the day that I saw him in the dark, my world collapsed down. I knew that from the moment that he saw me, he would never understand the real reason but I didn't even want him to. I hated that he was angry with me and I didn't want to deal with but I knew I had to. For the sake of the family. When I saw Mitali, I knew that as painful as it is,  Neil should move on with Mitali. I didn't like seeing the man I love move on but I knew he had to otherwise both of us wouldn't move on at all. There were times when Mitali got on my nerves especially when she told me to
Be away from my family. As much I hated that fact but it' was true. I needed to get away from the family. When Mowgli truth was discovered, I couldn't believe it. God kept me away from Neil for 10 years so why was he making me close to him again then? The day that Mowgli went away from me made my heart break and I was forever grateful for Neil to return Mowgli to me. Then when we met at the cliff again, he told me that he wanted to be back together and to be honest I wanted the same too. I love Neil and I continue to always love him. I told him how me and Mowgli were waiting and how Mowgli reminded me of him. We confessed our love and kissed our son seeing the sky. They say that no matter how far they are away from each other, the sky and earth will meet just like the sky there.