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Ryland's POV

"Excuse me, what?"

She didn't know me nor who I was. She acts as though she's never seen my face before but, with her condition, I don't think she has ever seen me.

"I-I'm sorry. You don't even know my name-" Yes, she did. "My name is Ryland Aries. I came off as a little insane."

I put my hand out as for her to shake it but she stares at my golden hand then back at me. Why would she shake a strangers hand? I wouldn't. Especially if he came over spitting out words of love. I had to treat this situation differently as much as I didn't want to. I had to treat her as though I'd never met her before while Everly wasn't pretending, she really didn't remember me and that was the sad part.

"A little?" Everly raised an eyebrow at me. "I think a lot."

"Yeah. Anyways, you might know my friend, Ezra? He came to see you in the hospital. Thats my best friend."

"Um, I think so. I think I remember him visiting. He asked me if I had remembered him before his visit but I didn't."

"Yeah, that's Ezra."

"Then, yes. I do remember him. And your last name seems extremely familiar: Aries."

Its because that's what you used to call me.

"Oh really? Small world, maybe."

"Maybe..." her voice trailed off as our awkward conversation carried on.

"Why do you want to know so much about me? And get to know me? I don't know you."

"Thats the thing, Everly, I know you."

Her eyes lit up in horror as her name slipped off of my tongue.

"I'm sorry, Ryland Aries, but i don't remember you. I don't even know what's real or not anymore."

That's it. That's fucking it!

"Everly, I could help you! I could help you remember. We spent a lot of time together before your... incident. I really could."

Her eyes looked at me as though she was genuinely debating on whether to let a stranger into her house. To let him in to her life. Someone she doesn't even know.

But she knows me. I know deep in her brain she remembers me. She has to remember me. I'm the only person who was there for her when everyone in her life left. When her parents didn't come home when we first met, I was there to patch up her hand: the result of not only anger but sadness.

No matter the state of mind I was in, it didn't even matter. All that mattered was that she was okay. Because she never was. She was never okay.

She doesn't even now it yet but she is in loss of her parents and her best friend. The only people she really cared about and they didn't give a damn. The sweetest, most caring girl in the world and they could even appreciate it. That's some bullshit.

The most important thing to me and it was taken from me. Even saying that is selfish. Everyone knows it was taken from her. Not from me. The memory of everything was taken from her and I'm here complaining and moping around. She's still there, shes still right in front of you, but to her, you are someone shes never met.

It wasn't taken from you, its just harder to reach now. I have to work for what I want, now.

No.

For what I need.

Everly looked down at her hands that were trembling. "I'm-I'm really sorry, Ryland. But, I don't think I can accept the offer."

What. What the actual fuck. Did she just make this even harder? What are you doing, Everly? I know you need you need these memories.

"Oh? Alright, I guess. Have a good day, Miss. Everly."

She raised an eyebrow at me before I turned myself around and walked away from her doorstep.

When she closed the door, I began to run. I ran. I didn't know where I was going but I didn't really give a fuck. I ended up in some wooded area behind our houses. I screamed my lungs out. Yeah, I know that isn't very "manly" of me but do you think I gave a damn? Ha, no.

I kicked at all the trees until my shoes had holes in them and ripped the branches from the trunks. I smashed them onto the ground like I was taking an ax to firewood.

"WHY!" I screamed, "WHY CAN'T SHE JUST REMEMBER ME?"

I rapidly hit the tree limbs against the grass and watched as the bark flew all around me. My hands were bleeding at this point but the pain was beautiful. Lovely compared to what I felt in my stomach. Perfect to what I felt in my heart. Heavenly compared to what I felt deep in my soul.

"WHY ME?"

When I smashed the branch on the ground, it scattered from my hands into a million pieces.

I exhaled, " I know I've done terrible things in the past. Nothing rightful of any of the happiness she has provided me with. But, why me? I was finally happy. I was fixing myself, I swear!"

I could feel tears pushing at the back of my eyes but I just pushed them away. "I just don't understand..."

I started to imagine things I didn't want to think of. I didn't want to think she would never remember me again. I missed her so much. I missed my best friend.

As I sat on a tree trunk, I felt something fall out of the pocket of my basketball shorts. It was my pack of cigarettes. They were my favorite thing when I bought them illegally but since I've been able to legally buy them, they're depressing.

I took one out of the box and stared at it.

"I told myself I wouldn't do it again."

But I lit the flame.
________________________________

Hey everyone

yeah i've been gone for so long but i told myself i'm going to update more often. i'm actually going to do it this time despite what i've been saying before.

i hope this update was worth the wait

~BlackMidnights

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