iMessage- Reddie ☼

we're over 81

Where's your head at- basement jaxx

———

Eddie; I want a boyfriend

Richie; that makes no fucking sense

Eddie; I WANT A BOYFRIEND

Bev; u have a boyfriend

Eddie; u right.

Richie; I don't get you

Eddie; that's right, you don't. It's not fair to me

Eddie; we're over

Richie; what?

Eddie; I'm sorry to say this but you aren't satisfying me anymore

Bev; EDDIE WHAT THE FUCK

Richie; are you serious?

Eddie; of course I'm serious

Eddie; why would I joke about being unsatisfied

Bev; this seems like a person problem

Bev; I'm gonna go..

Richie; what did I do wrong?

Richie; can you please tell me so I can fix it?

Eddie; you didn't do anything wrong. I just don't love you anymore

Richie; why tho?

Bev; Eddie you're being a dick

Richie; answer your fucking phone

Bev; dude don't be an ass

Richie; would you please answer!!!

Richie; pick the fuck up

Bev; what the fuck is going on

Richie; who the fuck is this?

Eddie; it's Eddie.

Richie; you're wrong.

Eddie; how am I wrong

Bev; how is he wrong

Richie; who the hell is this? Where did you get eddies phone?

Bev; what's happening

Bev; I'm so confused

Richie; Eddie is standing right next to me and has no idea what's going on

Bev; yo wtf! Dude who are you

Eddie; just break up with Eddie

Richie; NO!

Eddie; come on, me and Eddie would be way better together

Bev; I'm in shock. Who is this

Richie; it's Vic

Richie; right?

Eddie; it's not fair! I liked Eddie first

Richie; no you didn't!

Bev; what the f u c k

Richie; how long have you liked him

Eddie; since December

Richie; a-ha I've liked him longer

Eddie; of 2010

Richie; you've liked Eddie for 8 years

Bev; dude. That's a long time

Richie; would you please kindly return Eddies phone back to him

Eddie; so I have liked him longer

Richie; yeah well I have a longer dick

Bev; I don't see how that matters

Bev; or how you'd even know that

Richie; why don't you find some other dick to suck

Eddie; cause I'm in love with Eddie

Richie; no you aren't. You're a stalker

Eddie; I love him

Bev; ok, we are having a quiz.

Bev; the first to have the correct answer the fastest wins eddies hand

Richie; fine, I'm gonna win

Eddie; that's what you think

Bev; what is eddies favorite color

Eddie; pastel yellow

Richie; red

Bev; Oof Vic is right

Richie; what!?

Bev; what is eddies middle name

Richie; frank

Richie; come on give me a hard one

Eddie; how am I supposed to know that

Bev; really? You want a hard one? You got his favorite color wrong

Richie; fine that's my favorite color he has worn

Bev; eddies best friend

Eddie; Richie

Richie; mike or Ben

Bev; Richie gets the point

Bev; 2-1 looks like richie is winning

Eddie; but he's dating Richie shouldn't that be his best friend

Richie; no. My best friend is stan but I'm not dating him.

Richie; I wish I were

Eddie; boom! There we have it! Richie wishes he was dating someone else

Bev; he's kidding. Geez you don't know anything

Bev; eddies favorite word is?

Eddie; bitch

Richie; Richie

Bev; wrong try again

Eddie; fuck

Richie; ew

Bev; Richie wtf are you even trying to win your manz?

Bev; you're both wrong

Eddie; eds

Richie; I have no clue

Bev; 2-2 Vic gets the point

Bev; smh Eddie why didn't you just tell the man

Richie; I'd like to play an honest game

Bev; fine. This is for all the Eddie

Bev; what is the hardest thing for Eddie to say

Eddie; supercalafragelisticexpialedocish?

Richie; I love you

Bev; and Richie is the winner here

Richie; now please return eddies phone to him

Eddie; fine

Bev; and thanks for playing, tune in next week when mike and Richie fight over who wins stan. Spoiler alert, it's Richie.

Richie; I knew I'd win

Bev; Eddie? Or Stan

Richie; stan.

Richie; I just had a gut feeling

Bev; lol ok.