DARLIN' , tom holland

lxxx. | real life

arisa has been feeling sick lately and she didn't exactly know why. she's been vomiting every morning even when there's not a single drop of food in her stomach, headaches when she hasn't even been thinking, and extreme feeling of tiredness when she hasn't even moved. after weeks of constantly feeling that way, gwen had finally convinced arisa to take a pregnancy test.

"is it done yet?" arisa looked up from the three sticks resting on the bathroom counter, shaking her head. "no," she sighed. "gwen, what if i am pregnant? what if tom doesn't want a child yet and decides that it's already too much for him? what if tom think of the child as a burden? i can't and won't abort the child but i can't lose tom, either—"

"arisa," gwen snapped, shaking arisa's shoulders. "wake up and open your eyes. you and tom are married, okay? that man loves children and would do anything for one. he won't force you to choose between the child and him, he's not like that and you know it. tell that voice in your head to shut the fuck up because tom loves you more than he loves life itself and he'll love the child too, if not more."

arisa nodded, giving gwen a small smile. she looked back down at the tests, her eyes widening as her they caught a glimpse of what was in front of her— a positive. she looked at the two other pregnancy tests— both still positives. arisa's eyes widened even more as she covered her mouth, the plus signs winking at her as if they were mocking the female.

"oh my god, arisa! you're going to have a child— this is amazing," gwen squealed. however, her excited expression quickly turned into one of concern as she saw her friend's teary eyes. "hey, hey. aren't you glad about this?"

arisa sniffled, wiping under her eyes. "of course i am, gwen. i'm excited and i'm nervous and i'm terrified. i don't have a clue how to raise a child, how am i going to be a mother? this is going to be such a mess, i just—"

"arisa," gwen sighed exasperatedly, "you remember your vows, right? you said that you can't promise that you'll be the perfect wife or mother but you'll try to be, yes? arisa, marriage is about growing and learning. you'll learn how to raise a child, you'll learn how to be a mother and you'll be a damn great one. i've seen you with children and you're a natural, you just have to stop doubting yourself. how can you say that it's going to be a mess when you haven't even tried it yet?"

"you're right. i'm sorry for being such a drama queen," arisa chuckled, calming herself down. "hey, we all go through self-doubt here and there, you're alright," gwen smiled. "now, how are you going to tell tom?"

"oh shit, yeah," the pregnant woman groaned. "should i call him or do i wait until he comes back from work?"

"i suggest you call him. i think the sooner he knows, the better."

arisa sighed, grabbing her phone from her pocket and tapping on tom's contact. her finger hovered over the dial button, her thoughts racing quicker than a million miles per hour.

"darling? is there anything wrong? do you need anything?" arisa snapped away from her trance as tom's voice entered her ears, shaking her head to clear her mind. "um— yeah, i'm fine. i was just wondering what time you'll be able get back?"

"i'm not very sure but i'll definitely be there before dinner, why'd you ask?" arisa glanced at gwen from the corner of her eye who was already looking at her expectantly.

"nothing, i was just wondering. that's all, sorry for bothering you," arisa said quickly. the line was silent for a second, maybe it was tom being both confused and concerned for his wife. "alright. i'll see you by then, darling. i love you."

"i love you more," she whispered back before hanging up. arisa clutched her phone in her hands, preparing herself for whatever gwen had to say.

"what was that? ris, i thought you were calling him to tell him you're pregnant," gwen raised her voice slightly, crossing her arms and cocking an eyebrow expectantly.