LEILANI ***Under Editing***

⚫Chapter 11⚫

I turned to look at him, disbelief etched across my face. "What do you mean you can't?"

"My parents would have my head if I did that. It would ruin everything," he explained, his expression revealing the weight of familial expectations. "Ok, but this has absolutely nothing to do with your parents. I don't care if you're the next Alpha in line or that your pack is very well known in our region. This involves the lives of two individuals, in case you have forgotten. This involves me, and I don't believe it is fair that you unofficially reject me. In fact, I think this is very selfish of you."

"I don't know why you're so upset. If you want to be with someone, go ahead. I am not going to stop you," he responded, his tone detached.

I couldn't help but laugh in astonishment. "Are you slow? This isn't because I want to be with someone. I just want to live my life and I can't exactly do that until we cut ties." The tension between us remained, unresolved, as the canoe glided through the calm waters.

"Well, just know that you and I will never be together, so whether I reject you unofficially or officially, you can go ahead and live your life," he exclaimed.

The weight of Elias' heartless words hung in the air, crushing me like an invisible force. I turned back around with tears welled up in my eyes. The sting of defeat and unworthiness pierced through me, as if a dagger had been thrust into my chest. These were not the words I expected from the person I was supposed to share my life with. Elias had transformed from a prick to being downright awful, and the emotional toll was overwhelming.

I wanted our canoeing adventure to end right there and and then so that I could retreat to the cabin and isolate myself in the sanctity of my room. However, I knew I had to wait until we got back to shore. I couldn't show my vulnerability to Elias. I couldn't let him see the impact he had on me, even though it was painfully evident.

Continuing to canoe in absolute silence, I felt the tears trickling down my cheek, one by one. I braced myself for the inevitable wave of emotions that would come later. I hoped that neither Nathan nor Saphira would catch me in the act of crying. I wanted to keep this vulnerability hidden, at least until I could find a space to confront and process the overwhelming emotions in private. The serene surface of the lake masked the storm within, a silent struggle against the ache of rejection.

From that moment onward, I had decided not to be openly hostile towards Elias, mainly to avoid raising suspicions among our friends about any potential conflict. Despite this decision, I was keenly aware that I needed to keep my distance from him as much as possible. A part of me felt the desire to be with someone else just to spite him, but I recognized the childish nature of such thoughts. I wanted to hate him, but that wouldn't resolve this issue. Eventually I would have to move on and the idea of hating him for years made me feel uneasy. Life would just have to continue.

As we reached the shore, I eagerly stepped out of the boat, the only desire in my mind to retreat to the solace of my room. Our friends were close behind, and Saphira and Lucian had already arrived.

"Leilani, that was so much fun!" Saphira cheered with a bright smile. However, upon noticing my gloomy expression, her excitement turned into concern. "What's wrong? Why do you look like that?"

I shook my head, offering no immediate explanation, and together we made our way toward the cabin. "Is everything okay?"

"I'm good. I think I need to lie down until dinner, though. I'm not feeling the greatest," I truthfully shared with her. Reassuring Saphira that I was okay and just needed some rest, I headed up the stairs.

Once in my room, my stomach churned uncomfortably, signalling an urgent need for the washroom. Hastily, I rushed out of my room and made my way to the bathroom. Lifting the toilet seat, I couldn't hold back as my stomach rebelled, expelling this morning's breakfast. After the ordeal, I rinsed my mouth and washed my hands, lifting my gaze to the mirror. Despair overcame me, and my eyes began to water again. I wasn't accustomed to vomiting like that, but the sickness in my stomach seemed to mirror the deflation in my heart. My head began to throb, and I returned to my room, burying myself under the covers as the weight of the emotions spilled out in quiet sobs.