The Dragonfly and The Sword

Part 15: Avoidance and Letters

Exposed emotions lead to death.

Irina remained displeased with the sentiments expressed over the past few days. Any overt indication of her feelings could lead to a punishment, or worse. Thus, she decided it best to leave the room following Suzerain Abran's decision. If he questioned her later, Irina would blame her monthly womanly burden. No man enjoyed such a conversation and would not dare to question its authenticity.

A few weeks ago, Abran's words would not have mattered. Irina would have continued to play her role of the dutiful Suzera. A lady and warrior elegantly cocooned within silk and lace, able to contain her emotions. But, now, the ability to not picture Suzerain Abran decapitating her parents, when he spoke of capitalizing on Vetus's pain, alluded her. She could still remember her heart contracting while watching her parents fall to their knees. Still, she remembers the komans looking at her for guidance as she cried.

A real Suzera let the blood run until it dried. She could not see one more person die. And, she shuttered at the thought of almost losing more men in the most recent raid involving Shaed's unit of soldiers.

Shaed. The idiot had dominated her thoughts for far too long. She should have beheaded him when she had the opportunity.

Quick footsteps echoed behind her own. She glanced over her shoulder and scowled. Irina knew she did not have enough composure for this conversation. She needed to escape.

Irina hurried her steps, unwilling to be poised at present. Konrik Loren had exhausted her abilities to maintain her composure in Preena.

***

"What do you think of this statue Lady Irina?" he asked.

Irina took a moment to consider the ice sculpture. It seemed her response had taken too long, for he quickly filled her turn with thoughts of his own.

"Well observed, Konrik," Irina replied with a smile.

She honestly did her best to let his words melt out of her brain. Instead, her mind began a mental commentary of the proceedings while she continued to appear enamored with him externally. This practice would sometimes become onerous when Korak Fallyn spoke. The Korak had a way of agitating Irina's nerves with a simple look. Thankfully, Lady Toria's muff and glove battle provided Irina the entertainment and buffer she required.

Irina did not expect etiquette and maintaining a gentleman's high esteem to be so exhausting. It had never been to so—well, to the same extent—with Shaed.

Shock and unrest filled Irina during those moments where she let herself question what Shaed would think of the affairs in Preena. Things like, What would he have thought of Lady Toria's mental-warfare techniques? What would he say about this ice sculpture?

Oh, the latter one was dangerous. Sometimes, Irina knew Shaed's response would be one that let her lady-like "propriety" melt to nothing but a memory.

"Oh, that is such a fascinating insight, Konrik." Irina smiled, willing thoughts of Shaed away from her mind. "I will reflect on that further."

Irina turned slightly, accidentally bumping Korak Fallyn with her muff.

"Oh," Irina blushed. "Excuse me, Korak Fallyn. Sometimes I forget I am wearing this. It is just so comfortable and warm."

Korak Fallyn provided her a thin-lipped smile.

***

Irina stopped her thoughts. She did not need to reflect on what happened in Preena anymore. That diplomatic mission ended. Well, for now, at least. And, unfortunately, after being such a success, their exit left her flustered and unsure.