Adore [H.S.]

36

Coasts - Oceans

ISABELLA

In life, we tend to pre plan everything. As a child, we are asked what we want to be when we grow older. We are then, in a sense, expected to keep that preconceived idea of "what we want to be" and then live that out. Our whole life plan is practically chosen and decided in first grade because clearly you know what you want at six years old.

As we grow older, those preconceived plans change and morph into completely different hopes and plans. Our dreams change and become something brand new. It's only a small few of individuals that truly know what they want to do with their life - may those people be dancers, actors or musicians. I envy those people. The ones who just know what they want in life. Not only do they know, but they chase after it.

I look at my life and wonder where did it all change. When did I decide that I no longer wanted to be a vet (because I loved puppies) but instead wanted to pursue business. Was it my own preconceived plan to follow in my fathers footsteps (and ultimately be unhappy)? That seemed a bit far fetched, but then again, who am I to say otherwise. I was, after all, planning my own business.

"Alright baby," his deep voice speaks through the small cell phone speaker, breaking me from my thoughts. "I'm going to go walk this little fucker."

I hold back my giggles as I listen to Harry struggle. For a man who kept to himself, he was quite the volunteer. I'm still surprised that he agreed to dog sit this week. Not that I was complaining; I love puppies.

"Be nice!" I giggle into the line. He grunts, a few curse words escaping his mouth.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll be nice. Go rest alright?" I smile at his attempts to calm me down.

"Alright."

"Night babe."

"Night H," I wait patiently for Harry to hang up before I set my phone back down on my desk. As grateful as I am for the short distraction, I needed to get this sorted.

My desk is full of scribbled pieces of paper and business textbooks from a local library. Over the past few hours, I have tried to piece together a somewhat concise business plan. I didn't realize how frustrating it is (and especially, how time consuming) to create one. Every time I thought I had it all figured out, I found a minor flaw in the plan. This then causing me to rewrite the whole thing. For someone who had a bachelors degree in Business, I sure wasn't showing it. 

Harry's words replay in my mind. Take a break. Have a bath. I pick up my phone from my desk and check the time. It was already twenty past eight at night. I guess I could close the text books and notebooks. 

My limbs ached as my arms stretched out. I could feel the knots in my back loosen as I moved from side to side. The pull of the stretch feeling almost intoxicating. My loose fitted pants and oversized sweater cling to my frame. In one swift motion, I pull my hair up and tie it into a bun. Was it pathetic that I was already ready to go to sleep? Perhaps, I was turning into a ninety year old woman and not twenty-three. 

"She lives!" Jaz jokes from the couch as I emerge from my bedroom. I make my way over to the living room, collapsing on top of the adjacent couch. Ben chuckles beside Jaz. I had almost forgotten about Ben. 

From where I sit, I observe him. The resemblances between him and Harry were almost uncanny. How I hadn't put two and two together before is almost embarrassing. I was usually pretty quick to notice things, yet I had completely failed to notice that Ben was practically Harry's older looking twin. His hair was a curly mess on top of his head. His eyes not as vibrant of a green; specks of yellow made his eyes look almost cat-like. His features were less prominent than Harrys, but still rather attractive. Whatever is in their genes, I'm quite jealous.