The day I stopped singing in the shower

Chapter 20: Dildo

I knew I was playing with fire when I went to the library again on Thursday, but seriously, I needed to study. Seeing that Ace wasn't there the days before, maybe he wasn't coming today either. That was an absurd reasoning, but it was what we would work with. Speaking of Ace, he had called me again the night before. I had to put my phone on my bedside table's drawer to not pick it up.

Imagine how fun my morning was, when I wanted to turn my alarm off and I couldn't remember where I had put my phone.

Just when I got inside the library, I saw that unmistakable messy hair. He was walking towards one of the shelves. His back towards my direction. He was wearing a khaki green t-shirt and black jeans that fitted perfectly and showed off his amazing butt. I didn't know seeing him would get that reaction from me. My stomach made a flip flop and I turned around quickly, slamming the door behind me as I went outside and ran away as fast as possible. Okay, maybe I didn't run, I didn't want anyone to look at me weirdly, but I did walk really fast.

I went to my car and tried to calm myself down, my messy bun was even messier, locks of hair falling on my face. My face was pale and I looked like I had just seen a ghost. I closed my car mirror and started the engine. I couldn't study there. First of all, because I was trying to distance myself from him, and second of all because I wouldn't concentrate. I couldn't let myself feel what I felt everytime I saw him. I swear this wasn't healthy, I was about to have a heart attack at 21.

I went home and took a quick shower. I made myself a smoothie and settle down on my desk for a long afternoon. I took my books out, placed all of my highlighters in a line, and started my study session.

After two hours, I got tired and frustrated with all those equations and realized I had to get dressed and go to Chuck's house, aka Meghan's brother. I put on some clothes and went to the bathroom to put on some make up and brush my teeth. I went to play some music on my phone and saw that I had a missed call.

Ace.

Again, really? I wasn't joking thinking of calling him and asking him what the hell he wanted. Because, seriously. He never called that much. I went through my texts and saw he was typing. This time I didn't lock my phone or tried to throw it. I stayed to watch what he wanted to say. I was beginning to get frustrated. I was trying to distance myself a little bit and he wouldn't let me. It wasn't obviously his fault. He didn't know I was trying to do that. My feelings shouldn't be like this, but they were, and I couldn't do another thing than separate myself from him. Why so insistant all of a sudden? Fortunately, he didn't appear at my class like he did last week. I wouldn't know what to do in that situation.

He finished typing and I opened the text quickly. I was frowning thinking of how much this was affecting me when I saw what he typed.

is everything alright?

My heart cracked a little.

I felt bad, like really bad. No, nothing was alright. I was feeling more things than I should and I wanted to bury my emotions really deep underground. I was sure I would be seeing him tomorrow. I'd face him then. Just one more day.

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"You can't believe who I just saw." Said Nathan sitting down at our table.

I let out a sigh and took out my food. Knowing my luck, I already knew who it was.

"Ace." I mumbled giving him a defeated look.

"Oh my God, you got superpowers or something?" Both Nathan and Sarah glanced at me surprised.

"No, just very bad luck. Did you talk to him?"