QUEEN| ATHUR CURRY (AQUAMAN)

Sorry. Life happened😔💔

Before you guys get mad, I know. I left Wattpad for nearly a whole damn year.

I'm sorry.

A lot has gone on this year, and quite frankly, none of it is good.
Civil war broke out in my home country, Nicaragua. This is where my dad lives. So I worry about him, every single day. There is a lot of violence going on, like police killing civilians and people trampling over others. People are stealing everything they can, leaving little for everyone else. Keep in mind that my country is one of the poorest in the world. People in Nicaragua live on around $2 a day, and most of them live in poverty. This worries the hell out of me. Of course I don't want my dad to be around this shit, but he is, because he can never come back. He got deported from the US :(
Anyways that's one of the things that has made this year trash.
My parents got a divorce this year. A lot of people go through this, and it sucks. When my mom told me that she couldn't be with my dad anymore, life hit me like a ton of bricks. All I could do was cry. Automatically, you think that your parents will be together forever. But sometimes life is just too tough and you can't work things out. My parents have hurt each other in the past, plus a long distance marriage was not to work at all. I miss my parents being together. Now my mom has a ridiculous boyfriend, whom I just cannot get along with. And it's because he's not my dad. He can never replace him, and he just doesn't realize that. I just don't like him. He pisses me off. But, at least he makes my mom happy.
My mom and I have the worst relationship on planet earth. If you think you and your mom have a bad relationship, think again. My mom is a helicopter mom. She's controlling and very very rude. She emotionally abuses me with her words. I cry every night. She calls me ugly, fat, worthless, useless, hideous, evil, manipulative, possessed, anything you name it.
She used to beat me too, but now she doesn't.
My mom is bipolar, so she's always up and down. I don't blame her. Life is tough for a minority. I know that from personal experience. Being a minority in the US, is one of the hardest things I've encountered. I just cry a lot for someone my age, and it's not good.
I also had gotten back into a toxic relationship this summer. This ruined me beyond repair. This guy, who was my first love, and yes, I still love him, would have me when he wanted. It was toxic all around. This was more lust than love, which sucked. I was a doll to him. He would want me when he felt like it, and when he didn't need me, he'd treat me like shit. He would mess with my feelings and sometimes want me and other times would hurt me. I managed to get rid of him, but I still love him. I can't stop thinking about him for some reason.
I struggle with mental health too. I'm going through depression and anxiety right now. And let me tell you, these two diseases are a deadly combo. I have tried to take my life on more than one occasion this year. Depression is the hell inside me, and it eats me up... daily. I have no one. No one to help me. You know why? Because no one understands? My emotions are all over the place. I'm just sad. I'm just anxious. I just cry. All I feel is sadness and grey.
Lastly, I quit writing this year and lost an important friendship. I quit writing because I let other things distract me. I'm not as good anymore, but I promise I will start writing again. These chapters will be good! I just need your help with ideas.
Just be praying for me and thinking about me, I am going through too much for a teenager.
But just know that if any of you need a friend or just someone to listen to you, you can private message me.

Xoxo,
La Divina