Stewie and Brian(Family Guy)

Chapter 2

STEWIE:Hello!Hello!Hello somebody!Were trapped in here!

BRIAN:Your wasting your breath,this bank vault doors close automatically at the end of the workday,this thing won't open again until tomorrow

STEWIE:Well there's got to be some way out of here. Think!

BRIAN:I don't know,you think of something

STEWIE:Well I have no idea!

BRIAN:So you invented a time machine but you can't get us out of a safe?

STEWIE:Yeah,that's science I'm not Houdini.

BRIAN:I can't believe this,we are locked in here until tomorrow and the only thing I've eaten today was a grape Chris dropped at breakfast,took me half an hour just to get the damn thing of the floor

STEWIE:I'm uncomfortable,you have to change me

BRIAN:I'm not changing you,we don't even have any diapers. Oh my god that smell is making me sick

STEWIE:Oh,thank you for making me more self-conscious. I'm not gonna be able to stay like this until tomorrow you know

BRIAN:Well I don't know what you expect me to do about it

STEWIE:You don't?

BRIAN:No I don't. Stop looking at me like that

STEWIE:Look,I'm going to propose something,and I need you to hear me out promise me you'll do that?

BRIAN:I guess

STEWIE:You'll guess or you will?

BRIAN:Yes I'll hear you out

STEWIE:Okay,Well,I cant be in a soiled diaper until tomorrow Brian we both know that,I will get a rash which will led to an infection left like this

BRIAN:All right fine,I'll take the diaper off

STEWIE:That doesn't really solve our problem now,does it?

BRIAN:Yes it does

STEWIE:No it doesn't,though really. See your not. (Chuckles) Your not really thinking this through. We would still be faced with the problem of the oder,you see. And of course you know,then what am I gonna do with no diaper? I'm not gonna walk around here with my tic-tack hanging out I need a clean diaper

BRIAN:I told you,we don't have any clean diapers

STEWIE:Well,Well,no,I mean not right now we don't no. But if-if the poo were to be removed

BRIAN:I'm not following you

STEWIE:If the poo were to be removed

BRIAN:Wha-What does that,What are you driving at?

STEWIE:Eat it

BRIAN:What?

STEWIE:Eat it Brian

BRIAN:Your out of your fucking mind!

STEWIE:Now,you promised you'd hear me out. Besides,is it really that big deal? You just said yourself that your starving,and you know I've seen you eat poop before Brian

BRIAN:Yeah,Mine!

STEWIE:Is that really a huge distinction?

BRIAN:It is to me! I can't even,how would you,that's sick! That is sick! How messed up in the head are you that y-you would even ask?

STEWIE:Okay,okay just calm down,okay? Were not,were not. We are just talking,we are not doing anything yet,just talking nobody's doing anything at this point. Dogs sometimes eat feces,it's not a judgement it's just a fact,so what I would need you to do is eat what's in my diaper,lick the diaper clean,possibly lick my fanny and then put the diaper back on me. Probably lick my fanny,yeah you should start wrapping your brain about that too