just a dream (camren)

forty eight

:)

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July 27th, 2017

"Hi. You- you look..."

Lauren raises her eyebrows as Camila trails off, staring at her with chocolate brown eyes wide. "I hope that sentence ends with a positive adjective."

"Isn't you- you being so pretty you make me speechless a good thing?" Camila questions, before she meets Lauren's gaze with a small smile. "It means you completely... make me malfunction."

"I mean, it goes both ways," Lauren shrugs, sending Camila a teasing grin, "I could be so ugly that I make you speechless."

Camila snorts. "Like Lauren Jauregui and ugly could ever be in the same sentence and not be a joke or a lie."

Lauren's insides squirm, and she wants to say the words, but she isn't sure if she should. She knows Camila is still Camila, she just doesn't remember, but she doesn't want to say it to her while she thinks she's some other version of her. Camila had been so quick to find all of her faults, and Lauren isn't sure she'd a hundred percent forgiven her before she'd forgotten, or even accepted that Lauren had been Lauren the whole time. If she remembers after Lauren says the words, and she's still in that mindset, she'll probably think Lauren had fallen in love with some other version of her, and be angry.

Then again, she could have understood. She could have realised that Lauren had been Lauren the whole time, and Lauren is just being an idiot by keeping the words in. And maybe it's being honest with Camila that would finally make her remember. Lauren had been honest with Lucy, and Lucy had remembered everything. Maybe if Lauren tells Camila how she really feels, it would be enough to make Camila remember who she really is. After all, that's what Camila had always wanted from her. Honesty and communication.

She mulls it over in her head, but ultimately decides to push that away for now. When the time feels right, Lauren will tell her.

"So, where are we headed?" Lauren questions, ignoring the way her stomach flips when she takes Camila's hand. "What's the big plan?"

Camila smiles, "I booked us a table at your favourite restaurant. The Cuban one. And I don't want you to bring your bank card or any money. I'm treating you."

Lauren raises her eyebrows. "Dipping into your college fund?"

"I won't tell if you don't," Camila says, and for a moment, Lauren sees her, the real Camila shining through it all. "Seriously, uh, don't tell. My dad- he'd probably kill me."

"Your secret is safe with me, babe," Lauren assures her, holding out her hand. "Alright. Let's go."

Lauren lets Camila lead her out to the car, and hesitates, watching as her girlfriend darts to open the passenger side door. She smiles to herself, loving the chivalry, and sits down in the passenger seat, buckling herself up. Camila collapses into the driver's seat and turns the key in the ignition.

"I had to beg my mom to let me use the car," Camila admits to her, "my parents are always so protective over the car. It's like they think I'm going to crash it!"

Silently, Lauren admits to herself that she'd feel much safer with herself behind the wheel, rather than Camila, but that's just because she knows that Camila is clumsy on foot, let alone behind the wheel of a big mechanical vehicle that can go fast as hell and is easily the most dangerous mode of transport.

Instead, Lauren just smiles and says, "well, it wouldn't matter. I could've driven us."

"I'm treating you tonight." Camila tells her. "So that means no strenuous activity."