ii.
Harry is overwhelmed.
Incredibly, terribly, inconceivably overwhelmed. More so than he's been in a long while.
The last time he could think of something that had gotten him this worked up, was perhaps all those years ago, when he'd been declared alpha of the pack. It was a marvelous, very wonderful feeling that had him all smiles, his heart leaping with joy; however, there was the part of him that worried he would not be able to maintain and guide the pack to his best ability. There was fear lingering behind all the elation, that he would be a piss poor excuse for an honorable alpha that those within his people could look up to and have no reasonable fear that he would compromise their safety in any way. He feared that he'd never live up to the reputation his father had set before he and Harry's mum trotted off to their previous summer home in Sweden, leaving him in charge. A kind leader, with a firm hand and a strong presence – charismatic in a way that neighboring packs fawn over his arrival rather than disapprove of it, and lone wolves beg to be admitted, offering their lives up to him.
And to have left his son in charge of the pack, with that prestige to uphold? Of course, Harry would feel jittery.
Yet, those moments have not even a dime on how he's feeling right now.
Should he have so suddenly invited a human to dinner? No, most definitely not, especially with the connotation behind the invitation. It's not even like he truly meant to let the words slip from his mouth – of course, he wanted her there, even if it's still partially unclear to him as to why – but to do it so hastily? And without preparation? He simply wasn't thinking logically!
But how could he revoke this offer without her questioning him? No matter how short he can be when it comes to her asking things he at one time perceived she'd had no reason to be sticking her nose in, she was still an inquisitive little thing. Would wonder aloud to both him and Niall different things that she would like to know, and that she'd like them to share with her, but he would often shake his head or express that she need not know anything that doesn't concern her. Was he being an arse? A bit, but it was policy – outsiders are to know the bare minimum. The fact that he'd been allowing the visits between her and Niall – even if it was for his own selfish desires as well – was bending a lot of rules. Had he not been the alpha then his exile would be up for questioning but nobody questions him. Nobody doubts him. Nobody even thinks about challenging him.
Except for Y/N – she likes to do all of those.
So here they sat at dinner, the dining room was large and had a total of three very long tables to fit for each member of the pack. They were arranged in the way of an upside down 'T' with the vertical table being where Harry sat at the head of and the two horizontal tables deeper into the room. It doesn't much matter who sits where, so long as Harry has the head of the table, otherwise it's first come first serve for the others. His table gets their plates first, which is why most people fight for the seats within his presence. More often than not he'll have Mitch to the right of him, and the seat to the left of him is interchangeable – it was where his mate sat, and it's where the women and men within the pack who would have liked to take her place fight for a chance to sit.
Today Y/N sits here, eyes enlarged, taking in everything around her. The normally loud dining room has lulled to quiet murmurs and heavy stares as a human sits at the table for the very first time, besides Harry, in his mate's seat. He can feel the energy vibrating in the room; one of confusion, fear, and doses of excitement from the novelty of the situation. Truly, the only person who wasn't experiencing this restlessness was Niall, who sits to Y/N's left, ensuring her she was in for a good meal. When he mentions that tonight was a pie night, "and I'll ask for a chocolate slice for you. Sprinkles too!" Harry feels a weird sense of jealousy stirring in his chest that he wasn't the one to know this about her. Secretly, for these past few weeks, he's been incredibly envious that Niall was so familiar with her – what he would give for that closeness is worrisome. That's why he tries not to dwell on it too much.
