wallflower | taekook

thirty four

"I met a boy whose eyes showed
me that the past, present, and future
were all the same thing."
— Jennifer Elisabeth

Taehyung POV

It's likely people describe clouds as soft, or maybe feathers from a little bird or the pillows under your head as you fall asleep. As true as it is, these things all considered light and soft to the touch, nothing compares to the touch of his lips against my own.

The smooth flesh that tasted slightly like raspberries from his drink, and the warmth of his body I pressed my chest to his, trapped against the wall as I held him there. Jungkook was melting against me, no objection evident in any part of his being as his tongue pushed past my lips to dance with mine. It's crazy to think someone so stubborn can submit so easily with just one kiss.

"So are you guys just going to loiter in the hall all day or do you want to come in?" Yoongi had opened the door, there was nothing but sass and mild annoyance laced throughout his tone.

I pulled away from a nearly breathless Jungkook, his cheeks were tinted pink and his lips slightly swollen; for a moment I really wished we were back at his place.

"Uh, yeah-" the ravenette stumbled and brushed his fingers through his hair while also nudging me from standing so close, "We were just- we'll be right-"

"Give us a second Yoongi." I cut Jungkook off. Clearly he wasn't going to argue about that.

Yoongi just nodded and even laughed a little before closing the door to leave us alone again, "You're cute when you're flustered." I whispered to the younger. His cheeks were still slightly pink and his chest was still rising to catch his breath, the kiss I left to the skin under his cheekbone didn't help the blush from going away any time soon.

"Let's go pretty boy." I smiled at him.

Jungkook seemed to be getting more attractive every time I look back at him. There's always something new to notice and appreciate amongst his already stunning features. If it's not the gentle slope of his nose then it's he pink color of his lips that make me wants to taste them again. He was the drug I couldn't get enough of.

Yoongi must have noticed my sudden fondness of the youngest boy, it was apparent from the way he was smirking over at my from the kitchen when we entered the nice apartment.

"Jimins in his bed, he hasn't gotten up and I don't think he knows you're here." he said.

Jungkook nodded and we walked over to the metal stairs that spiraled up to their shared bedroom. There was a small lump under the white sheets and a mess of blonde hair at the top above the pillows. Jimin barely looked alive under there if it wasn't for the slight rise and fall of breath.

"Let me talk to him first." Jungkook whispered quietly. He glanced at me and I nodded, "Of course, whatever you want."

He nodded and the tips of his teeth nibbled on his bottom lip, that nasty habit.

"Don't do that," I kept my voice low, the pad of my thumb brushing over his bottom lip so he would stop biting it.

"Sorry," he mumbled.

I leaned down just enough to kiss his lips softly, not missing the smile that appeared when I pulled away, "I'll wait downstairs."

Jungkook nodded again and let go of my hand to walk over to the bed quietly. Before I could leave entirely I saw him climb into bed with the blonde, soon running his fingers through Jimin's hair to get his attention away from his own thoughts.

There was a whine from him that I couldn't quite catch, but not before he rolled over and clearly gasped as he saw his best friend instead of his boyfriend. The surprise was welcomed and Jimin wrapped his arms around Jungkook's neck, the ravenette smiling widely and embracing the other.

I left to give them some privacy, not wanting to listen in on whatever they were going to say when it wasn't my place.

"So how's Jungkook?" Yoongi asked once I made it down the stairs and walked towards the kitchen. The oldest boy was sitting on a stool by the island and picking at a bowl of cut fruit. I could tell it was Jimins bowl by the way he likes to cut the fruit into shapes.

I just shrugged, "I think he's doing okay."

Yoongi didn't seemed convinced, then again it's rare to ever get a huge reaction out of him. "Have you seem this?" he asked me after, pulling out a brown notebook from amongst a stack of cooking books.

The brown notebook was familiar, I knew it was his. Jungkook is always writing in it; from random doodles to story ideas.

"Did you take that?" I asked, it was strange that anyone but the ravenette would have it. It was even stranger to think that Yoongi would be someone to steal it.

He just scoffed and slid it across the marble island to me, "Of course not, he left it here."

The cover looked smooth but was rough from use, even the pages seemed frail from constant turning and brainstorming. I was hesitant, the want to delve deeper into the book and see what goes on in Jungkook's head and what he finds important to write down was irresistible. Yoongi must have seen me cast a glance over my shoulder towards the stairs, "If he comes I'll tell you."

"Why are letting me do this?" It was an honest question, but Yoongi could have just answered with his eyes, the concern inside them was evident enough.

"Because I know he won't tell you."

That's all it took, also knowing Yoongi wouldn't do something like this just because he could. There must have been something really important.

I skipped the first part of the notebook, they were mainly consisting of cute doodles that were relatively good and some story ideas I didn't want to read, those weren't worrying.
It was the bookmarked page, a small date scribbled on top from almost a week ago, and the deeply etched words left in black ink. They were supposedly song lyrics, a string of words with the promises of darkness and a march to the end disguised in happy pills.

It was all quite unsettling.

"I asked him to help me with a song, I haven't had the best luck." Yoongi talked quietly, "I didn't think that's what he was thinking about."

They were all gloomy and drug related, or somehow filled with hate and a sadness that doesn't seem to go away. My chest ached and I felt my teeth graze my bottom lip as I kept reading the few pages of lyrics. "It doesn't mean anything though, they're just words." I said. Yoongi didn't seemed convinced.

The older boy sighed, "Any other person may have been trying to write a song about a topic that someone else could relate to, but this time," Yoongi paused and reached forward for the notebook, "It's too close to what's happened before."

I just nodded, my head was still thinking of the words u til soft laughs were heard from a distance. Jimin was walking down the stairs with Jungkook behind him, their fingers intertwined as Jimin pulled the ravenette along. "Taehyung!" the blonde smiled wider once he notices me sitting in the kitchen.

"Hey Jimin." I managed.

"I didn't know you were stopping by, together." Jimin said finally letting go of Jungkook's hand to go to the fridge.

Yoongi spoke up first, "Baby your fruits here." he said while pushing the small plastic bowl over to his boyfriend. Jimin smiled softly and thanked him, shutting the fridge to take the bowl in his hands instead.

"We're going to get home," I said, glancing at Jungkook who was already looking in my direction, "Sorry we couldn't stay longer."

Jungkook nodded and waved a bit, "It was nice to stop by."

Jimin nodded and added another strawberry to his mouth along with the others stuffed there, "Maybe we can make plans for another day." Yoongi said. His hand was lightly rubbing Jimins back as he tried to swallow without choking and dying on the kitchen floor.

We said our goodbyes and finally made it back out to the nice hallway, Jungkook was walking quietly beside me and I couldn't help but think about what could have been going on inside his head. Without speaking, I reached for his hand and intertwined our fingers, and seeing his small smile at the simple action was enough to make me feel better for now.

• ♡ •
first update of 2019 !!
hopefully this year is also
a good one