THIRSTY » C. EVANS

༌ 009 ༌

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OWNER OF MY ASS

SOF
oh my god
SOF
there's fan girls outside of my house yelling lopevans
SOF
am i going crazy or did people come up with a ship name for us

OWNER OF MY ASS
i saw that ship name on my explore page on insta i think it's kinda cute

SOF
chris
SOF
they're banging on my door
SOF
how did they even find my address
SOF
i'm gonna scream

OWNER OF MY ASS
ok so don't do that
OWNER OF MY ASS
they'll eventually get tired of waiting and just go

SOF
or they'll get tired of waiting and instead knock the door down and kill me because i didn't come out

OWNER OF MY ASS
you have a very creative mind

SOF
yes i know
SOF
hold on i'm gonna go and meet them i really hope one of them doesn't turn out to be a killer

OWNER OF MY ASS
be careful

SOF
always am ;)

OWNER OF MY ASS
didn't u tell me about the time u fell off ur roof like... a day ago?

SOF
shut up evans

OWNER OF MY ASS
alright fine i'll zip it
OWNER OF MY ASS
sike

SOF
christopher robert evans shut up so i can meet these wonderful fans

OWNER OF MY ASS
ooooo u know my full name?

SOF
i literally wanted to fuck u
SOF
of course i know ur full name

OWNER OF MY ASS
wanted?

SOF
what?

OWNER OF MY ASS
past tense

SOF
u ask too many questions
SOF
one of the fans gave me food i love life

OWNER OF MY ASS
that was a nice change of topic

SOF

OWNER OF MY ASS
ok damn u didn't have to bring back those painful memories

SOF
hold on imma go beat my meat before i fall asleep

OWNER OF MY ASS
ok i'll be here
OWNER OF MY ASS
all alone
OWNER OF MY ASS
by myself
OWNER OF MY ASS
with no one to talk to

SOF
CHRIS I CANT BEAT MY MEAT IF U KEEP SPAMMING ME

OWNER OF MY ASS
IM SORRY IM LONELY

SOF
alright alright
SOF
let's talk
SOF
actually u wanna facetime?

OWNER OF MY ASS
at 2 in the morning?

SOF
yes

OWNER OF MY ASS
what will the neighbors think 😱😱😱😱

SOF
let them think what they think 😏😏😏😏

OWNER OF MY ASS IS CALLING...
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