minnow // sirius black

thirty-two

32 : carols

I slept in my bed for the first time in months that night. Sirius and I had went to our room, while Lily and James were still watching Esme, and he helped me out of my frozen clothes and shoes, using a charm to warm me up without causing my body to go into shock before he helped me into warmer clothes.

He sat next to me in our bed, holding me against his chest as we both stared at the wall.

When Lily came to put Esme to bed, she apologized.

"I didn't know you were in here," Lily said, tilting her head the slightest to the left.

"It's alright, Lily," I said softly. "Can I have her?"

Lily nodded, coming to my side of the bed and giving Esme to me, smiling softly as she nodded to me and Sirius before likely going into her own room. She was probably grateful she would get time with James in their room.

I held Esme, her tiny little head in the crook of my right elbow, my hand supporting her bottom. With my left hand, I softly smoothed her dark hair. She had the cutest little nose.

"I love you, Esme," I whispered as I slowly scooted out of the bed, gently taking her to her crib and gently laying her in it as softly as I could. "Sweet dreams, little pup."

Christmas Eve was spent as if it wasn't Christmas Eve. James and I couldn't even fathom celebrating without Mum and Dad, their deaths still extremely raw in our hearts. We avoided the subject of the holiday until after sun down when James cautiously mentioned hearing about a caroling group raising money for local orphanages the following night.

I decided that was how I wanted to spend my Christmas - with my remaining family listening to carols.

So we spent that day sitting in the living room, Lily, James and Sirius discussing the best way to go out and listen to the carolers in Godric's Hollow without being recognized.

"Our best bet would be to dress, and act, like Muggles," James admitted.

"There are very few Muggles in Godric's Hollow, and those that are Muggle know someone magic," Lily said quietly. "We might as well glamour ourselves."

"I agree with Lily, if we use glamor charms, we won't be recognizable. Jem can make sure that nobody sends any spells at us, and even if they do, we'll know," Sirius had said. I nodded slowly, all eyes on me.

They'd all been slightly less cautious around me, since I'd started sleeping in my own room and coming out into the living room. But they still acted as if I was a fragile glass.

I had lost my mind, just a bit, after Mum and Dad died, my entire world was crumbled and destroyed.

"Glamour charms work well, if they're done right," I said, smiling softly. "I call being blonde!"

"One of you two has to have dark hair, since Esme does."

"Hence why I called being blonde," I smirked at James, turning to Sirius as Lily and I got up. I handed Esme to him, winking as we went into the bathroom. "I'm going complete opposite."

"You have to," Lily snorted as she closed the door. "Your face has been on the front page of multiple issues of the Daily Prophet."

"Good point," I snickered as I started changing my hair to be very short, blonde, and much straighter than my natural hair, but still curly. "I look ridiculous blonde."

"You look insane."

"Yeah," I laughed gently as I changed little details about my face. Now, I changed the way my nose, mouths, eyes and general face looked. "How do I look now?"