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"And then, I was like, no way are her boobs real! I mean, boobs are not that big and definitely not that perky!" 

Harry's girlfriend is as annoying as a person could possibly get. 

Whether she's gnawing on her gum like it's her life's purpose or squealing on the phone to her friends that Louis didn't even know existed, she's very fucking loud and rude and Louis wishes she would just die. Or at least fall off the face of the earth; either way, he'd be grateful.

It'd also be fucking great if Harry and Niall and Liam and Zayn could stop staring at him.

It's like Louis has suddenly grown thirteen heads and an extra dick, because every time he opens his mouth to speak or even to breathe, all eyes are suddenly on him. And he'd rather not face the interrogation that is sure to come after the group is finished recording their vocals. 

"Is it true that you have a girlfriend?" Liam whispers to Louis like it's a huge secret, checking over his shoulder and looking back at Louis with raised eyebrows. Louis reponds with an eye roll and takes his time sipping his water before he bothers to answer.  

He takes a deep breath, sees Liam tense in preparation; "No."

Liam visibly deflates. "What? Harry lied, then?"

"No, Harry is stupid," Louis provides, tossing his empty bottle in the recycling bin outside the recording booth and plopping down in a random chair a few feet away from Colette, who is busy tying at the speed of light on her screen. Her dark hair is straight and hangs around her face in a sort of curtain, but Louis can hear the gum snapping in her mouth and her heels scratching up the floor as she taps her foot. "Eve is just my friend."

"But-"

"But nothing, Li. I'm gay, remember?" Louis doesn't know why he has to explain this, especially to Liam.

"But you and Harry are friends again?"

"Oh, the very best of them," Louis is getting bored. Harry is staring him down from the recording booth, Niall is messing with the different dials and switches, and Zayn is leaning against the wall, asleep. 

"You haven't said a word to him since we got here."

"That's not true," Louis protests, "I said 'hello', and he said 'hi', and then he ate a banana while I texted my sister-"

"That doesn't count," Liam insists. Louis throws his hands up in the air and slides down in his seat, pressing his chin flat to his collarbones and grunting. "Louis, come on. Harry has really missed you. When he comes out, ask him if he wants to walk down to the break room with you to get a snack.

"I'm not hungry, so, I'd really rather not-"

"You're going," Liam says firmly. 

"No."

"Louis."

"Liam."

"Harry," Harry beams, strolling over to the pair of them. Louis wants to laugh, but he also wants to get up and bolt from the room. Locking himself in the bathroom seems like a fairly good option. 

"Oh, hi. We were just talking about you, actually," Liam blurts, and Louis has to fight the urge to face-palm at how dumb everyone in this band is. 

"Oh really? Talking about how hot I am, are we?" Harry has that stupid smirk on his face again, and he's looking right at Louis. Louis feels like he's in high school again, facing his crush - who just so happens to be the stereotypical school jock with pretty eyes and a million dollar smile - for the first time out in public. Or maybe that never actually happened to Louis in high school. He really doesn't remember, because he can't think about anything else except for the fact that Harry is sitting next to him. 

The fact that he's holding his girlfriend's  hand isn't exactly helping.

"No, we were talking about how terrible your voice sounds today," Louis says, and it's a complete lie but Harry blushes anyway and fidgets in his seat. 

"I'm kind of hoarse," Harry explains, but he doesn't sound hoarse to Louis. 

"You're not hoarse, Hazza," Louis furrows his eyebrows. Why is Harry acting so strange? "I was only kidding. What's got you so wound up?"

"Nothing," Harry responds just a little too quickly for Louis' suspicion to settle, but he nods slowly anyway and decides to move on. 

"How have you been?"

"Alright," Harry licks his lips. Twice.

"Just alright?" This is incredibly awkward, and Liam has 'mysteriously' disappeared. He's probably watching the two of them with binoculars from somewhere. 

"Col and I have been spending a lot of time together."

At the mention of her name, Colette's head snaps up. She looks around momentarily, makes eye contact with Louis (and rolls her eyes as well, Louis might add) before she seemingly loses interest and goes back to texting what has to be six million people. 

"Hashtag Harlette was a worldwide trend," she chimes in. Louis bites his tongue until he thinks he can taste blood.

"What the fuck is a Harlette?" he asks instead. Harry smiles nervously and toes at the ground with his white converse.

"Well, 's just what the fans call Colette and I," he seems to be embarrassed, and usually Louis would be taking full advantage of that if he hadn't caught the way Harry's thumb was moving against the skin of Colette's hand slowly and soothingly while in return the girl ignored Harry and limply held on to his hand in return. It makes Louis' blood boil in his skin, and he knows that if he were fortunate enough to feel Harry's hand against his, he sure as hell would never let it go.

welcome back to caught! updates will probably be on fridays and saturday nights and during the week if i can squeeze them in. i hope you're readyyy, and i promise colette won't be around for long.

#harlette

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