Silent whispers

Neuf

in time of
trembling
hands and
fiddling
fingers,
of clumsy
feet and a
dry throat,
You pulled
me into your
heart for an
invitation to
drink, just
to kick me
out mid-sip.
That was
when I knew
love could
take a form
of grogginess,
hallucination
even.
For you
stood on your
stage sticking
stars on the
back of my
shoulders for
everyone to
see, just to
peal them off
with my flesh
when the red
velvet curtain is
down, saying
that my skin
was bright
without them.
That's when I
used to the
idea of my body
being a canvas,
where your lips
were the brushes
and your tears
the colours.
But soon the
canvas turned
to a stop station
for every man
to rest, because
they said that they
loved me sooner
and touched me
softer than your
ever did.
But it was
More due to
me not yet
used to
spending
nights praying
for a boy to
hold me because
I failed to love
myself with all
the scratches
down my hips
made by fingers
of barbed wire
and bruises on
my chest left by
another.