LUCIFER | Kim Taehyung (COMPLETED)

18.

It had been three days but Taehyung hadn't talked to me once. He had substituted my position as his assistant for Nami and the later did not leave one opportunity to rub it in my face. He didn't give me an explanation and every time I tried to approach him, he would ignore me or pretend to be busy.

I did not know what had ignited this behavior but a part of me was convinced it was something to do with what happened at the restaurant the other day. He somehow knew my mother and other than that nothing made sense.

I was determined after class to go and sort things with him. In the past few days we had made quite progress with our relation and actually started getting along with one other. I wasn't going to let it go all down the drain now.

I patiently waited for Miss Han's class to get over. Just as we were done, I dashed out of the room and towards his office. Without knocking I walked in. He was busy doing something and looked up from his laptop.

"Nana, what do you think you are doing barging into my office like this?"

"Taehyung-ssi, me and you need to talk", I said closing the door behind me.

"Not now, I am busy"

"You have been saying this for the past few days. I know you are trying to avoid me and that hasn't escaped my notice. So if you have a problem, talk it out with me. Don't act like a kid and run away from it"

Taehyung's jaw hardened yet he managed his calm, not responding to that.

"I know it has something to do with my mother. How did you know her?"

"Nana, please leave. I don't want to have this conversation right now", he said, his voice almost shaking.

"I am not leaving till I have answers", I clutched my fists. "Tell me, how did you know her?"

"Nana, don't make me do this", his voice almost broke down. "Just leave.. please"

"It's not that hard. If you know something about her please tell me. Did you meet her when you came to earth at that time? How did you know her?"

"Nana", he said it almost like a whisper. "Please leave. I don't want to talk". I could see he was trying to stop himself from breaking down into tears.

"You are getting so emotional over her meaning you knew her well. IF YOU DID, WHY AREN'T YOU TELLING ME?", I raised my voice even without intending to.

"FINE, YOU WANT TO KNOW - I LOVED YOUR MOTHER. I LOVED HER, BUT SHE HAD TO FALL IN LOVE WITH THAT ASSHOLE ANGEL FATHER OF YOURS"

I was shocked seeing him. Tears were rolling down his eyes and he was a mess. But he loved her? And she fell in love with my father - who was an angel? That did not make any sense to me. All of it seemed like it was out of a fiction.

"You loved her?", I asked meekly, a tear rolling down my own eyes.

"I did, I did with all my heart. And she would have been here, alive and well if...", he fell to his knees, not completing his words.

"If what?"

No response. He kept crying without saying a word.

"IF WHAT TAEHYUNG?"

"IF IT HADN'T BEEN FOR YOU. YOU ARE THE REASON SHE IS DEAD IN THE FIRST PLACE. SHE DIED GIVING BIRTH TO YOU"

It felt like time had stopped and someone slapped me in slow motion. The ground beneath my feet had been snatched and I found myself falling into an oblivion. My mother died giving birth to me? She did not die in an accident like grandpa told me? I was the reason she lost her life. Hot tears rolled down my cheeks. I looked at Taehyung sobbing uncontrollably. Instinctively I turned on my heels and ran away from there, my heart shattered into a thousand pieces.

———•••———

Hoseok was talking to grandpa asking him what was wrong since he looked exceptionally gloomy today.

This is when the front door opened and Nana walked in. She stopped at the sight of them and for a moment Hoseok was taken aback by the sight of her - crying, hair a mess and black streaks of mascara running down her cheeks.

She walked past him and to where grandpa was. "Why did you lie to me?", she directed her question to him.

The old man just kept looking at her, not sure what she meant.

"Why did you lie to me about my mother? She did not die in an accident, did she?"

His eyes widened as he looked at Nana who seemed furious and broken at the same time. Even Hoseok was taken aback as he heard this.

"Who told you that Nana", the older man asked.

"It doesn't matter", she replied. "I want answers and I want them now. I am tired on not knowing who I am and what I am. Please just say the truth one time", she fell to her knees.

"Hoseok, take me to my room please", grandpa said standing up. Before Hobi could hold him, Nana interfered.

"You are not leaving until you tell me what happened?"

"Nana, please let Grandpa rest. We can talk later...", Hoseok tried to approach me but stopped as I glared at him. "Hobi stay out of it. It's between me and him. Please don't come in the middle"

He immediately retreated from the spot. Grandpa was facing the other way so I walked to where he was.

"Tell me, what happened? She died giving birth to me, didn't she?"

He didn't say anything, just kept looking at the floor. "All these years I lived without knowing anything. I lived thinking it was some stupid car crash that killed her while in reality I was the reason all along"

I saw tears fall from his eyes and to the ground. It hurt me seeing him in pain but I had to do it. If not now, I would never know the truth.

"And the man, my father. Who is he? He wasn't human was he? What was he? An angel.."

Hoseok was shocked to see Nana say this. He didn't expect her to know the truth. But he assumed she must have come to know everything because of Taehyung.

"She.. she..", he began but stopped as a knot formed in his throat. "She was my child. My only daughter. She did not deserve that. She did not deserve to be taken away from her father", he cried.

I felt my heart break into a thousand pieces as I heard this. If it wasn't for me, she would have been alive and well. Grandpa wouldn't have lost his daughter and Taehyung his love.

"She was stubborn, like her mother..", his voice brought me back to reality. "I begged her to not have the child, despite that she did. Your father", at the mention of the said man, his voice turned full of despise and anger. "He may be an angel but in my eyes he is the biggest sinner ever. He was the reason Hwayoung died"

Soon the anger turned into pain as he fell to his knees crying. I couldn't make anything out of this mess. Nothing made sense to me except for the fact that I was at the root of everything bad that happened. In saving me, someone lost their life.

Grandpa turned his attention to me. "It was Hwayoung's death wish that I should take care of you. And so I did. But all those years I couldn't bear to look at you without my heart breaking a thousand pieces. You reminded me of what I had lost"

My legs without any control started turning back as I ran away from there and straight to my room. Just as I was alone, I fell to my knees, crying my heart out. It hurt me so much knowing how unwanted I was. Everyone blamed me for my mother's death. It was me who should have been dead and not her.

The entire night passed as I cried by the window. By dawn, I didn't have any tears left to cry. As I saw the sun rise, a thought entered me. Maybe If I wasn't here, no one would be sad anymore. My presence kept reminding them of her and everything that happened.

Maybe I should just go away somewhere far, away from everyone.