Cupcakes and Mistakes

30

JK's POV

"Okay, that's it. This is like so awkward.  What, no one's gonna talk?" I heard Jennie exclaimed. Her expression tells me she's so done with all of us, the two of us to be specific.

She was eyeing Lisa and I as we sat just beside each other while the rest of them sat opposite from us. Jisoo's demeaning gaze not helping one bit. She's still mad obviously.

I tried drying the invisible sweat on my hands as I gently rub them at the side of my pants. The moment all seven of us came in inside Blackpink's dorms, I've been so restless. And even after I saw her, my heart didn't calm down even for a bit. In fact, I think I ended up getting twice as nervous as the day we debuted.

"I'm grabbing some food," Chaeyoung stood up from the couch, shaking her head in amusement and headed straight to the kitchen.

"Ouch! Hoseok oppa!" Jennie unnie started whining. Hoseok hyung literally just pinched her Mandu cheeks yet again.

"Keep quiet," he whispered but it was so obvious how he was having fun seeing Jennie getting pissed. I'm glad I brought them along for distraction. I was sure the rest of the Blackpink still didn't like me staying around their maknae. Not after what happened.

From the other side of the couch was Namjoon hyung sitting beside Jisoo noona. They weren't talking, and like Lisa and I,  everyone can clearly feel the tension surrounding them. I realized that Jisoo noona took everything out to Namjoon hyung. Aside from me, he took the biggest blow out of all this.

A nervous laugh escaped my lips. Fuck, I didn't know to see her again like this would make me nervous. In fact, I can still feel my knees shaking. Her effect on me tripled if that's even possible. I wouldn't admit to the boys but right, even the way Lisa tucks her hair behind her ears gives me the sense of thrill and chills on my body. My heart is literally hammering inside my chest.

I was goddamn stupid for even being confused with my feelings. I mean, seeing her now, I feel like I would embarrass myself. It's like I am starting to question if I even deserve her. Because God knows she deserves so much more. She deserves everything good in this world.

She deserves the best.

"So..." she started and I had to curse internally because her hoarse voice sent dirty thoughts on my mind. Yeah, it was just me and my stupid libido.

Fuck Jeon Jungkook. Gotta focus here, man!

I started coughing and she was looking at me a little confused.

"Hey, are you okay?" the moment her hand touches my shoulder, I flinched. My eyes widened when she was caught off-guard.

Is this a fucking k-drama or what? I was so sure I felt my stomach churning with her mere touch.

"Is there something wrong, Kook?" she asked and I shake my head immediately.

I don't want her to think that there is something wrong and that something weird is going with me.

"Nothing, cupcake," I gulped. Even calling her cupcake now makes me so shy. "I must have eaten something bad earlier," I reasoned and she just raised her eyebrow. "Can you give me one second?" I asked and she just crossed her arms and nodded.

I immediately stood up and stared at Namjoon hyung's direction,  who got the signal real quick and went to my direction.

Everyone was looking at us weirdly and I pulled Namjoon hyung towards the kitchen.

Chaeyoung was there eating some sliced apples while staring at us, her eyebrow raised but that isn't any of my concerns right now.

"What?" Namjoon hyung asked and I started freaking out. My hands grabbed a fistful of my hair and whisper-shouted.

"Hyung, I can't do it. I'm so nervous I feel like my heart is about to jump off my chest! Here, feel it!" I grab his hand and let it rest on my chest and his eyes widened. And then he did it, he started laughing.

"Jungkook, what, are you having a crush on your ex-girlfriend?" he teased and I grimaced.

"She's not my ex, hyung," I hissed and I heard Chaeyoung chuckling.

I knew it.  I shouldn't have told them. Now they're going to tease me endlessly.

"Don't you tell Lisa about this Chaeyoung," I pouted and she chuckled even more.

I hate them. And now I feel like a girl.

"Sorry Jungkook, it's just so adorable," she said while laughing. "Imagine having your heart about to burst because you see someone you love? Isn't it adorable?" she giggled and I grimaced. So much for keeping this a secret.

"I hate you. I hate the two of you," I told them and Chaeyoung smirked.

"You don't feel like that when the two of you were together?" she asked and I rolled my eyes.

"Do I have to tell you?" I answered and she nodded rather too enthusiastically. I sighed.

"I do, okay? I feel butterflies and all with her even before. But it's tolerable. But now, even the way she smiles at me feels like my heart will stop beati-stop laughing!" I whined when both Namjoon hyung and Chaeyoung started laughing.

"God, why did I even bother. I hate you guys. Forget this happened. I'm going to talk with Lisa," I was about to turn my back when Chaeyoung called my name. This time, she looked like she was smiling sincerely.

"Do you want to know why you're feeling like that?" she asked and as much as I hate to admit it, I was quite curious too so I nodded.

"Because this time, the fact that she may not accept you back os bothering you. Because this time it was different. You really have to work really hard to earn her respect back Jungkook. You were doing good with the letters. And I can see you've reflected towards your actions. So don't mess up this chance. Coz this might be the last," she then walked passed me even patting my shoulders.

I thought about her words.

"Is that it? Because I was afraid to lose her?" I whispered and Namjoon hyung messed my hair.

"And you were afraid to mess everything again. So work your ass up maknae because I can hear Taehyung making your girl laugh out there," he stated and I turned around and indeed, Taehyung was working his magic.

"Yah, hyung!" I whined.

I'm telling his girlfriend about this.

My eyes landed on the very girl who can easily make my heart beat like I was on a marathon.

Lisa, I promise I won't mess up this chance.