Our Fooling Game

020

Percy Flynn

"Another breakup?"

Punch. I paused from my assault to the punching bag. "No, I'm not in a relationship."

"So," James wiggled his brows. "Single and ready to mingle?"

"More with a Pringle than with you," I answered with a smile.

"Fuck you." He grunted as I punch the bag again, having lost focus a bit. "You know, you're not really helping with my self esteem."

I slanted my head at him, raising a brow. "You're covered in tattoos with dyed red hair. You're the last person with self esteem issues."

"Hey, not true. I have as much issues as the next-door twink."

"Really?"

He sighed, waving his hand and my question off and focusing back on holding the bag. "Back to you, why are you like this if you didn't just get your heart snapped or some poor girl's?"

I glared at him and he raised his hands up and said instead, "Sorry... rich girl's heart." I rolled my eyes and he laughed.

"My heart is still in place, thank you and I didn't break anybody's."

"So what then?"

I threw a punch at the bag, my mind flicking to Spencer and back to reality, "I'm confused."

"'bout what?"

"My next action? Reaction? Step to follow? What to do?"

"Is this about the guy that kissed you thinking it's your brother, who you now have feelings for but he's in love with your brother who happens to not be a big fan of him?"

There was a little pause as I put my answer together, "Yup."

"What happened then? Did you guys fuck?"

Just the question alone made my heart flutter and I missed the bag, almost punching James in the process.

"What the hell?!"

I huffed, turning away and running a hand through my hair. "Sorry."

He smirked. "So, you guys didn't fuck?"

"No!" I pulled at my hair and continued in a much softer voice. "No and can you please stop saying, fuck?"

"Why? You say it all the times and you happen to have done it a lot of times too."

"Not with Spencer," I glared at him, picking up dumbbells.

"Ever imagined doing it, your first time with a guy?"

". . . No."

"Wh--"

"Why are we talking about this anyway? Nothing has happened." I cut him off.

"Your reaction says otherwise. Fess up."

I sighed. "We just kissed."

"Oh." James said, looking at me with wide excited eyes that I couldn't help but chuckle. "That's progress right, we should be clicking booze cans."

"Yeah, but, that's after he might or might not have admitted to still loving my brother and feeling something for me too."

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh," I dropped the dumbbells and slide to the floor. "What the hell do I do now? I'm so happy and at the same time so bumped out. I don't want to go way over my head and set myself up for hurt. I don't want to be used and at the same time I'm not letting him go. I've never wanted something so bad in all my life." I sighed, covering my face with my hands. "Yeah, we've not fucked and I've not imagined it once. I don't care, I just want him. I want him to reciprocate this burning feeling in my chest. I want him to smile because of me. I want to make him happy and at the same time, being happy myself." I looked up at James. "Is that selfish?"