Chapter 10

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Harry's POV

"Oi! Potter! Is it true that you're anorexic! Food disgusts you!"

My dorm mates and I had just arrived to the Great Hall for breakfast. It seems everyone is still bent on torturing me.

"Ha! Bet you it's true! Hell, I bet even more that he does it because he knows how disgusting he is!" A Gryffindor screeched. People started laughing.

"Maybe all that fames gone to his head. He needs to be absolutely perfect, even to the point of killing himself!" Another one joined.

How did they even find out that I don't eat. I mean I do, but only when I need to. I've always been like that, so why is it now that my appetite is the talk of the school?

"Yet, killing himself off would be way better! Hey Potter! Have you thought of killing yourself yet?"

I kept shrinking into myself. It's like everyone is finding all the negative things about me and rubbing it in my face. Am I ever going to get a break?

"He's a Slytherin! He thinks he's too good to die! And yet that's what he deserves for being a worthless liar!"

Tears were threatening to slip out. "Shut it all of you!" My head snapped up to look at a fuming Malfoy.

Did he just...defend me?

"Oooh, looks like you got a boyfriend!" Draco darted away from me and wrapped his left hand around the Gryffindor's throat, his wand in his right hand, aimed directly at his abdomen.

"Insult him again and I'll make sure you can't breathe for a month! You got that!" The Gryffindor had slight fear in his eyes.

"Draco! Just put him down. It's fine." I said as I got up and walked over to him.

"No! It's not fine! And I'm gonna make sure this arse gets obliviated out of this school!" He hissed back.

I put my hand on his shoulder. His head whipped to meet my gaze. "Please? Let's just go."

Draco kept eye contact with me for a second, but then sighed.

He reluctantly released the Gryffindor. However, before he left the room, he grabbed a few items of food off the table and then left with me.

We decided to just go to our first class of the day, Charms.

Draco and I took our seats in the back of the class, then he put the food on my desk.

I gave him a weird look.

"Eat it."

"What?"

"I know you're not eating Harry, so eat it."

I looked down at the food.

Well, I haven't eaten in a few days. Maybe a little bit won't hurt.

I grabbed the piece of toast that sat on the desk and began nibbling on it. I got half way through eating the piece of bread when I got terribly sick to the stomach.

I made a disgusted look as my stomach turned.

"I can't! I'm gonna get sick!" I shouted putting the bread back on the table.

Draco sighed and sat in the seat next to me. We were the only people in the room at the moment. "Harry?" His voice was soft. It sounded hesitant, worried. I looked up to meet his gaze. "Do you starve yourself?"

I couldn't reply. All functions of forming words had left my head.

He can't know. No one can. No one can know that I starve myself. That I hurt myself. That I hate myself.

They just can't! I'm the savior of the wizarding world, I'm supposed to be perfect, a hero.

"Harry please?" He was desperate. His voice cracked. My eyes swelled up with tears as I tore away from his piercing gaze. He grabbed my chin and forced me to look at him. "Is it true?"

I let out a shaky breath and closed my eyes. A tear traced it's way down my face. I didn't have words or at least I couldn't form them.

So, instead I only nodded his head at his question. I kept my eyes shut, however, too ashamed and scared to look him in the face.

He probably hates me. He's disgusted with me. I revolt him.

Though. Even with these thoughts in my head, Draco never let go of my chin.

"Why?" Is all he seemed capable of saying.

"It's a long story. I don't want to talk about."

Draco looked at me long and hard. "If you don't want to tell me, that's fine. I understand that you don't trust me yet, but I swear Harry, I'm gonna make it so you can eat normally again, and sleep, and anything else that needs to be fixed."

I finally opened my eyes. Shocked.

Draco Malfoy just said that to me. Of all people, it was Draco that said he would fix me, but he can't.

As much as I like the pleasure in the idea of being normal. I'm too far gone and once he realizes that, he'll leave.

I tore away from him. "I'll be fine, Malfoy. Don't worry about me."

He was about to protest when students began to walk into the classroom and he no longer was able to continue the conversation.

Kids snickered as they saw me. They made fun of me just by staring and laughing at something a friend had to say.

Yeah. I'm just too far gone. There's nothing anyone can do about that. I will always and forever be a burden. I shouldn't have been called 'the boy who lived' but rather 'the boy who should have died.' Maybe then my parents would still be alive, maybe then people didn't have to put up with me. Maybe then I wouldn't be dragging Ron and Hermione into dangerous situations. Maybe then I wouldn't be so much of a failure, so disgusting, so unworthy.

And so, Draco will never be able to stand to his words because when he learns my secrets. The fact that my very existence never truly mattered. I......Will no longer exist in this world.

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