Tommy Shelby - Who I Am

23K 351 40
                                    

LAST DAY TO SEND IN YOUR ENTRIES!!
This song kind of inspired me,listen while you read!

You stared at yourself in the mirror,tears silently rolling down your pale cheek. You couldn't hide it anymore. It was who you were and you didn't want to pretend anymore. You didn't know that you would lose your family as a result of it. They hated you. They wanted nothing to do with you and were disgusted. They didn't tell you these things but you could see it in their eyes every time they looked at you.

You thought you would be supported by the three most important people in your life. You remember when you called a family meeting and told them. Your mother cried and walked away - she had always wanted a little girl and the news broke her heart. Your dad had slammed his glass down on the table making it smash into a million pieces. Your uncle John. The one person that you were closest with and could tell everything too,he pushed you away  every time you tried to hug him. He wouldn't look at you or even acknowledge you.

You had tried to cut your hair off before but your mother had caught you Sat in front of the mirror,your long brown hair was twisted in your hand and the scissors were so close.

"Don't you dare. Don't even go there" your mother snapped when she saw what was about to happen.

"But mum,please. I don't like it. I don't want to be a girl anymore,I thought we talked about this" a few tears escaped but your mother didn't care.

"You will do as you're told,young lady" and she slammed the bedroom door shut,leaving you to cry into your pillow. You ended up crying yourself to sleep that night,wishing that you could be normal and asking God Why you had to be so different.

That morning you were woke up to your father,Tommy, sitting on the edge of your bed. Your eyes fluttered open and he sent a soft smile your way.

"Your mother told me what happened. Why Y/N?" Tommy sighed when you didn't answer he carried on knowing that you weren't going to talk.

"C'mon,wake yourself up. We have a family dinner today,go put your makeup on and that nice red dress. This is just a phase and you will outgrow it. I promise."  Tommy left you alone,sending one last smile your way.

Everybody in small heath now knew about the Shelby Daughter who was going to hell,all because she didn't feel comfortable in her body.

You were teased and taunted and called horrible names. You walked down the street with your head low so nobody could see your tears. You refused to show them that their words hurt when in reality the words cut deep. The only thing worse than their words were the glares and comments that you would get off of your only family.

So now here you were. Friday night. Almost time for family dinner. Nobody knew that you had no intention of showing up. You sat watching the tears roll down your cheek and fall off your chin.

"Why can't I be normal?" You whispered. You stood up and walked towards your bed where an outfit was laid out. It consisted of: one of Tommy's shirts,a pair of trousers,Tommy's long coat and a peaky hat. You had already cut off all of your hair.

You quickly changed and examined yourself in the mirror and for the first time in a long while,you smiled. You were finally happy with yourself. This is who you were supposed to be all along.

You sat yourself in front of the mirror once more and flipped the blade over in your hands. They wouldn't be upset. They never wanted a son. I'm going to hell anyway,you thought to yourself. And with that thought,you put the blade against your wrist and cut. 

"They don't get it" you whispered.

You didn't look at the blood,you never liked the sight of it. Instead,you watched as a single tear slipped down your face and you smiled. You were finally who you were meant to be.

A few minutes later your bedroom door had flung open,Tommy was getting impatient and didn't want to wait for you any longer.

"Y/N? What the fuck is taking you so long?" Tommy soon stopped in his tracks when he saw the blood dripping to the floor. He rushed over to you and tried to stop the bleeding but he couldn't. He checked your pulse but it was too late. His baby was gone. He cried silently as he hugged your body and it was only then when he realised what you wearing. You were wearing his clothes and on your face sat the ghost of a smile.

"I'm so sorry baby. I should have been more supportive" Tommy cried silently until his brothers pulled him away. They had found him cuddling you when he didn't return downstairs for a while.

It was the day of the funeral and everyone was deathly silent. They hated what you had done but knew it was partly their fault.

"I got so fucking close to accepting it" tommy leaned his head back and whispered to the sky,a few tears threatening to spill.

"I'm so sorry, I love you....Son"

And Tommy knew that wherever you were right now that you were happy and only hoped that you heard his words.

And Tommy knew that wherever you were right now that you were happy and only hoped that you heard his words

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

I really hope you guys like this one!

Peaky Blinders Imagines  Where stories live. Discover now