12-08-80

.10.

"You boys can't be serious!" I protested. "I can't shoot at my best friend."

"You won't be." John said calmly.

"What are you talking about!? He's dressed like he's about to settle a riot or something!" I said pointing at Adam.

"That is just for his safety in case you miss." John informed me. "You need practice and he's very much alive. It's not safe for someone who is alive to be used as target practice."

"Oh! Then what am I going to be aiming at?" I asked.

John wouldn't look at me. "Me." He was almost inaudible in saying it.

"Wait. You?" I yelled at him.

John nodded seriously.

"You want me to shoot you?"I whispered harshly. I scoffed. "What kind of crap is that!? You give me the best kiss I've ever had in my life! You make me feel high and like im the luckiest girl in the world. You make me your girl and tell me that you love me, something I've only ever dreamed of hearing from you! And now you want me to shoot you?" I screamed at John.

John let his eyes lock on mine, unfazed by my screaming. He reached up and dried the tears from my face. Tears I hadn't known I was shedding.

"Yes Her Majesty that's exactly what he wants." Adam sassed me.

"I'm not being a brat!" I jabbed at him.

Adam put his hands up in surrender.

"Listen Julian, it's going to be okay. I am a spirit so the bullet wont 'kill' me. I will suffer through the pain and your shot will decide how much I suffer. Once my 'heart' stops ill be restored. Trust me. I've tried to end this spirit life. I can't. Ill be back beside you in a matter of minutes." John smiled reassuringly.

I nodded and backed out of the drive.

"Where are we gonna go to practice?" I asked.

"My house." Adam said.

Adam lived on a large portion or country land. He had many secluded acres of land. Perfect for shooting.

On the way there, Adam broke the silence by asking if me and John were really dating. I threw a water bottle at his face. Sadly I missed.

When we arrived at Adam's house he retrieved his paint gun which John would use to shoot at Adam. We walked around to the back field. John held my hand and whistled Strawberry Fields to get me to cheer up. How could I cheer up though? I was about to shoot and kill John Lennon.

"Here is good." John said. "Jules you stay here and Adam and I will walk on a bit. When I say 'mr. Lennon' you shoot okay." I nodded. But I wasn't exactly sure what I had gotten myself into.

John walked on. He directed Adam a bit. Then he gave me a thumbs up. He made himself invisible and walked away from Adam. When he returned to visibility he did it slowly. He raised the paint gun and said in a deep voice, "Mr. Lennon."

It was my cue. It took me a minute to lift my hand. Adam pretended to get shot. I knew John would be mad if I didn't shoot. I lifted the gun fast and pulled the trigger. I didn't see the bullet hit him because I closed my eyes to the scene. I heard him scream though. He screamed and screamed. Deep, painfilled screams.

I missed...

I fell to my knees in tears and covered my ears. This was the nightmare I'd never wake up from. I'd always know that I shot him. Another shot was fired and the screaming ceased. I sat there sobbing. I was in shock. My fragile soul was not meant for such violence and terror.

A hand grabbed my shoulder and pulled me into it's owner. The man's arms hugged me close. I grabbed onto the figure. I knew at once it was John. I looked up.

"It's alright now. I'm okay." He said through his own tears.

"Don't make me do that again." I begged.

"No. No I'm sorry I made you do it in the first place. I promise you will never have to shoot me again."

"Come on Jule, let your boy toy go and let's get on with practice." Adam yelled.

"Adam she's in shock. She can't do that again." John yelled at him.

"But what about her aim? She paralyzed you but she wasn't anywhere close to killing yo-"

"Just shut up and get to the car!" John yelled.

He picked me up and carried me to the car. He sat with me in the back seat. Adam was driving us home.

John kept apologizing to me. I kept apologizing to him. I had vowed to do my best, but I hadn't; I wimped out.

"Are you alright?" Adam asked.

"As alright as I could ever be after shooting someone I care about." I said calmly.

"I'm sorry I made you do that." John whispered into my hair.

"I should have done better. Why didn't you make me do it again?" I asked.

John gave a breathy laugh. "For starters it hurt like Hell! But it seemed to hurt you more. We'll practice more later, but I promise you won't be aiming that thing at me again." John explained. I hugged him tighter.

"What do you have in mind oh wise one?" Adam smarted off.

John's reassuring smile left and he shot Adam almost a glare. He wasn't happy with Adam suggesting that I shoot him again. And Adam's back talk was pushing John's limits.

"How about she shoot you!" John said.

"Ha! HA! Very funny. She'd kill me with that aim of hers." Adam joked.

"Good! Then you'd know how it feels to be killed by someone you love!" John yelled. "You wouldn't let it happen again. I guarantee it!"

I sat back and watched the argument unfold.

"I didn't know how much pain it would cause!" John defended himself. "On either side of the gun." John was steaming.

"If I was in your shoes I'd make her do it again. Jule you can't wimp out of such a serious matter." Adam retorted.

"What do you even know about this!?" John screamed. He had been the one to tell Adam of our predicament, so I found this remark rather dumb on his part.

"You're so thick! You call her your friend but you can't see past the tip of your nose!" John screamed at him.

Adam pulled into a gas station and stopped the car. He got out and yelled back in. "I don't have to listen to this!"

He slammed the door and walked off.

John let his head fall back and covered his eyes with his hand.

"Are you okay?" I asked. He wasn't himself. He was usually happy and joking. But looked to be under a great amount of stress. Anybody would be if they were in his shoes though.

"I just wanna go home and drink champagne with you curled up to me." John sighed. A small smile told me he was joking, only slightly, but still joking. I smiled in relief and kissed his cheek before getting out and driving us home.