Aerial

The Twenty-Third Chapter

"Just makin' up for yesterday."

There was an inventory of things that you had expected when you opened your apartment door early the following morning after Harry's very public and very resolute performance outside of your window, but finding Harry sitting on your front stoop with a tattered copy of Franny and Zooey clutched in his fingertips and a bouquet of ten teddy bear sunflowers by his side wasn't exactly it. It's hard to know what Harry is going to bring to the table next, but it's comforting to realize that it will almost always be unpredictable and stunning. You've never been a person who'd enjoyed surprises very much before you met him, but now that you're forced into a daily ritual of them, they're starting to become your most favorite thing in the world. Besides the smell of cotton candy, the color pink, sailor-level cursing, lo-fi rock and roll, creamsicle chewing gum, worn oxford loafers and heart-shaped sunglasses to match a pair of raspberry punchbowl lips.

Your parents would be absolutely terrified of Harry; the leather, a myriad of cryptic tattoos, his smoking, where he rests his head at night, his criminal history, the opaque slang, the reckless free love, the all-around nonchalant and self-justified air of trouble. He's not exactly someone you bring home to mother. And that may just be another major reason why you're drawn to him so much.

And Jesus wept.

An odd, spontaneous feeling of déjà vu wraps you up in smooth silk when you find him coolly stretched out on your steps, dividing and multiplying your vision before reorienting, your feet nearly swept out from underneath you when a taste of your dream from last night soaks your tongue and dissolves away before you can properly savor it. This must be how Harry feels at all times when he's around you, like peering up into the sky and wondering how the puffy buttercream clouds would feel to hold in your palms before realizing that if you actually got too close, you'd simply slip right through them and disappear into their divine vapor.

Based on observation you know that Harry is driven to the verge of insanity by his wayward memory, but he's so offended by negativity that he works extra hard to keep gloomy thoughts at bay. Especially in your presence. For your sake.

You wonder if he goes home alone to his van at night and drives a fist into his pillow when he becomes overwhelmed with resentment for what he's lost, if he wishes that your history wasn't so one-sided, if he harbors any bitterness towards his former self who, for now, only exists within fairy tales and spoken fables. You have to remind yourself that the person in front of you is in fact Harry's former self and the person that had you met months ago in auditions was simply an imposter, a dark shadow cast upon the very real and very tender human who has run circles around you for weeks in order to obtain the one thing that is finally occurring tonight.

A proper date with you. No work, no coworkers, no nagging thoughts. Same page. You and him.

And you're not even sure how you're going to withstand the next several hours of practice laid out ahead of you and even worse, how Harry is going to survive them. You've been feeling an enormous relief of pressure ever since you agreed to his date, but suspense for the event itself has begun to replace the former anxiety of the unknown. But unsurprisingly, he's in spectacular spirits this morning. A halo of golden dust spins threads around his crawling damp curls likely still wet from a cold shower this morning, a waxy piece of gum beaten to death between his molars, a haphazard pile of pink cigarette butts on your top step, a creamy white, buttoned-down long-sleeved shirt donning his torso with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows.

He must be reflecting the same smile that's conquering every inch of your features including the sparkle in your eye, because he's practically gazing into a glistening mirror with a similar expression, "I didn't bring you any sunflowers yesterday, so I figured I needed to double down today."