When Ground Met Sky

The Gates of Polis

Lexa's POV

"Gon We!" [Leave]

"Sha Heda. [yes Commander]

I waited till i heard the creaking of the door to close and the sound of footsteps echoing distantly to cease before I walked towards the balcony that was attached to the commanders room. I leaned forward gripping the railing of the balcony tightly. My knuckles turning a shade of white as i gripped the railing, as if holding onto it would keep me from falling into my thoughts head first.

My mind spun and my head throbbed. Every inch of my being shook loose of the hold that I had on it since the day Costia died. When Azgeda killed Costia my world shattered into a million pieces at my feet. Gustus had held me until I stopped crying, until i locked my heart away in my chest and glazed my eyes of all emotions. I had been called to lead my people and I found temporary peace in my duty. My people needed me and that was enough.

I had hardened my features and stole the ability to feel away from myself. I robbed myself of all emotional capability. I told myself that I had no emotions, that I didn't feel. My heart became as stone like as my features. Of course I felt, deep down I ached. Being the Commander required an emotionless mask which I used to hide my emotions, even from myself.

Yet here I was, bent over the railing of the balcony my heart in my throat. Tears welling in my eyes, I would not allow them to spill over, I never did. I took deep breaths in private, in the corners of rooms I repaired my mask. In shadows I ached but in the light I ruled over my twelve clans with a fierce hand. Nobody saw past my mask, I was the heartless commander. The heartless commander who's heart was her biggest weakness.

Clarke was the first person to see past my mask. To see and understand my hurt. From the first day I saw her, staring into her blue eyes I felt weak. A weakness that crawled under my skin and churned in my stomach when ever I laid eyes on her. At first I fought it, I fought the emotion. The feelings that crept across my lips when she leaned into me.

I stepped back from the balcony and into my room. I stared at the bed, the beautiful furs that lay across it. I wanted nothing more than to have Clarke here with me. The fate of the Night Bloods heavy on my heart, I felt a different kind of weak in her absence.

"Heda!"

I stood up from the bed quickly and brushed myself off. "Come in."

"A Natblida has been spotted across the Azgeda border!"

"Just one?" My chest tightened and I felt the bile crawl up my throat.

"Sha Heda." Realizing the graveness of his news he dropped his gaze to my feet.

"Gather the ambassadors in the throne room." I motioned for him to go. He turned quickly and shut the door behind him.

Once i heard his footsteps fade i took a deep breath but it came out shaky. I could feel the anger rise within me, setting my arms on fire. My fists balled at my sides in an attempt to suppress the anger that grew sharply within me. I turned suddenly and swept the back of my hand across the table throwing its contents to the floor. The anger faded quickly and i dropped to my knees with my head in my hands.

The anger faded into helpless sadness. Tears threatened to stream down my cheeks, my hand wiped them away quickly. I rose to my feet and threw the door to my room open, it hit the wall with a loud thud that echoed down the halls. I stormed into the throne room.

The seats were already filled and the quite buzz of conversation ceased, a deadly silence fell over the room. The air grew thick as I stood in front of my throne, looking down on everyone present. They all knelt respectfully before me. All but one. The scars on his face sent a cold chill down my spine.

"I will not bow before Heda, she is weak."

"What makes you think me weak?" My gaze fixed intently on him.

"You have been absent in Polis. Your pursuing of certain activities in Trikru territory has led to some...unfortunate events here in Polis." His face lacked any emotion as he mentioned the missing Night Bloods. "Events that could have been avoided."

I raised my chin slightly. The hatred bubbled in the back of my throat.

"Heda prevented a war and forged an alliance. You will bow to your Commander!" Titus spoke angrily from my side. He began to approach the Azgeda ambassador.

"Titus. He does not feel the need to bow before me." Titus glanced back at me confused. "Let me speak to you in private."

The man smiled cockily and happily stepped forward.

"I have a message for Queen Nia." I smiled back at him as he stepped in front of me and onto the balcony.

He turned to meet my gaze. My foot connected with his chest as he fell backwards and over the side of the railing. I turned to face the remaining ambassadors as his screams faded, "Now, would any one else like to question my decisions?"

Seeing no disobedience I returned to my throne and sat back comfortably. Titus stared at me for a moment before nodding and returning to his spot beside my throne. I made a mental note to deal with him later.

"A Night Blood has been spotted in Azgeda territory by a scout." I scanned the room to see the exchanging of concerned and confused glances. "The removing of a Natblida from Polis is an act of war." Everyone straightened in their seats.

"Titus, tell me exactly what happened."

"I wouldn't have to if you had been here Heda."

I glanced around the room as the anger pent inside me began to seep through the cracks of my mask.

"Leave us!"

Everyone stood quickly and exited the room. All except Titus who still stood beside my throne.

"Come forward Titus."

He took a confident breath before stepping off of the platform on which my throne sat. He walked in front of the throne and stood patiently waiting for me to speak.

"Fleimkepa, the Night Bloods were stolen from Polis under your protection."

"They should have been under your protection Heda."

"But they weren't! They were under yours!" I stood from my throne suddenly. Unable to pin the anger inside any longer. I desperately wanted to kick him off the balcony.

"Heda" The calmness in his voice sent waves of hatred through me. I rushed forward and pressed my dagger against his throat. How dare he remain so calm when the deaths of the Night Bloods would be on him!

I pressed the knife harder against his throat. My eyes held an icy hatred.

"Are you going to live with my blood on your hands also?" His voice cut through the air sharply.

"Their blood is on your hands!" I shoved him away from me and watched as he fell to the floor.

"The blood of your people will always be on your hands Heda. You cant wash it off can you? The blood of the fallen always stains the hands of the murder."

"Shof op!" I twisted my dagger in my hand, hatred boiling inside me. [Be quiet]

"Heda!" Gustus burst through the doors of the throne room. His eyes quickly landed on Titus who made no effort to pick himself up off the ground. His gaze fluttered to the knife in my hand and then to the hatred in my eyes.

"There is commotion at the gates!"

I looked at him questioningly. His gaze shifted as if telling me something I hoped so desperately to be true.

"Clarke?" The words left my lips weakly.

He nodded slowly and motioned for me to follow him. I glared down at Titus and then to the guard who was currently stationed at the door.

"Lock him up!" The guard moved forward.

I walked quickly behind Gustus, hope of seeing the ski girl growing in my chest.

There she was, at The Gates of Polis.