Chapter 56: Fourth Life - Living with Walls

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Sunny skies and white cotton clouds watched over our village of Pingfan. In the back yard, I planted a small garden of yams. Plucking out the roots, I brushed the dirt off the yams as I placed them into a wooden basket.

I lived with my mother and father, but they were really my aunt and uncle. Aunt Tongfua and Uncle Haozhi. They had a daughter, Chun Mei, my cousin. My parents died when I was young, and my aunt and uncle took me in. They had always treated me like their own.

"Rong Xin? Is Ah Mei home?" Ying Jun called for me from the front of our house.

Happily, I rushed over and greeted him, "Ying Jun, you're here?"

"Aw, I came to see Chun Mei. See if she wanted to go to the festival with me tonight."

A sudden jolt shook inside my chest.

Grinning, I told him, "Ah, she went out with mother and father today to the fields."

"Great, I'll head there."

I watched him disappeared down the path. Since young, it had always been me, Chun Mei, and Ying Jun. As we approached our late teen years, the two grew closer. The villagers always joked who Ying Jun would end up marrying. Although I knew he only had eyes for Chun Mei, I secretly wished that he would choose me.

As an orphan, I'd thought maybe my not having parents ruled against me. But not only that, Chun Mei outshone me by a thousand. Her long black hair tied loosely into a braid down to her waist, her cheerful smile infectious and charming, her slender figure small and graceful.

My hair was charred from being in the sun that it changed into a burnt brown. My poor health led to dark circles and a weirdly shaped body with wide shoulders and a spacious backside. I didn't like my body, and I assumed neither did Ying Jun.

Once again, I was going to spend my time at the festival alone. Chun Mei would invite me along with her and Ying Jun, but I knew he would rather spend it alone with her. Lagging behind listening to their laughter and loving conversations pained me, but being on my own having thoughts about them also gave me pain.

I tried not to think about them. Not to think about how lonely I felt. Love was part of growing up, so I wanted to wish them well.

However, one night while every one had gone to bed, I came out of my shared room with Chun Mei and overheard Mother and Father talking.

"You know it's time. We have to send someone," Father said to Mother.

"Has it really been fifty years?" Mother sighed.

"This time... the responsibility has fallen onto our family."

"We cannot send them away. I can't bear it, husband."

"We have to send one of them."

"Are you saying you want me to send Rong Xin?" Mother looked into Father's eyes. I let out a gasp.

Just what are they talking about? Sending me away?

"You know I won't let them take Chun Mei."

"Rong Xin is my brother's only child. I raised her like my own!"

"Chun Mei is your flesh and blood!" Father's roar rattled Mother into silenced. It was true. No matter how much Father and Mother loved me, I was not their own. They were blessed to have Chun Mei be born as Mother suffered two miscarriages in the past.

"Then what do you suppose?" Mother asked.

"I will talk to the village council tomorrow."

With the last word, Father carried the candlelight into their room. Mother followed and closed the door. My hand gripped the corner of the wall nervously. I didn't want Mother and Father to lose Chun Mei, but what would happen to me if they sent me away?

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