December // A Winter Soldier Story

33

ｊａｎｕａｒｙ ６ｔｈ， ２０１４

３１°

ℬ𝓊𝒸𝓀𝓎

Days pass by without any good chances to escape. Each time Bucky thinks he may have found a clear path, something goes awry and they lose their window of opportunity. The windows are starting to get shorter and shorter.

Lea has been subjected to more torture throughout this time. Bucky has no idea what they have been injecting into her veins, but he knows it can't possibly be good, and she is running out of time. Her bones are showing now through her skin, and her eyes are hollow. The supply of energy and spite she had at the beginning of all of this has nearly been exhausted. He hopes that somewhere inside of her, the courage and bravery he admired so much before is still there, and that these traits can help her hold out until he can get her some help.

But he is worried that she will fade away before he can.

This is all heightened by the fact that over the course of the last few days, Bucky has been growing closer to her. He can't explain what it is like to be in her presence, but even when she is half-dead with exhaustion and pain, she is fascinating and beautiful and headstrong. He is enamored with how she claims she knows nothing of what is means to be brave, yet is one of the bravest people he knows. Even when bleeding out, even when drowning, even in the face of an entire organization that is trying to force information out of her, there is a light in her eyes that refuses to go out. No matter how much pain she is, she won't give up any information on Steve.

Watching her makes Bucky want to be a better person. He still doesn't quite remember all the details of who he used to be, and he doesn't know if he'll ever be able to break through the fog that Hydra has instilled in his mind. But he desires her bravery, her courage, her loyalty. He's spent years of his life fighting for somebody else's values - he wants to have some of his own. Like Lea.

This all runs through his head as he sits with her, holding her hand between the bars of her cell. The warmth of her grip is so powerful it eases his breathing and relaxes his muscles.

Her blue eyes are staring at him as he thinks, but he doesn't notice this until she asks, "what are you thinking about?"

The fog clears and his vision focuses on her. He doesn't want to tell the truth for fear of seeming vulnerable, but he's tired of being afraid. "You."

Lea appears slightly taken aback. She cocks her head, her eyebrows knotting. "What about me?"

"Everything." She is more confused by this, but to Bucky, that word conveys nearly all of the emotion he is capable of giving. "I hate that you're here, but I'm glad we crossed paths."

Her expression softens, a ghost of a smile playing on her lips. "We crossed paths before this, you know."

A troubled expression paints his face. "I know. But I don't remember much of it. The things I do remember...I can't tell if they are memories or dreams."

She rubs her eyes and sits up in an effort to think about something other than the pain that is enveloping her. The face she makes, a grimace so genuine it makes his blood run cold, suggests that she is suffering more than she is letting on.

"The first time I saw you, you were still under Hydra's control," she begins. He nods. He had assumed this.

"I was in the woods, taking a walk like I used to like to do. The trees were bare, there was two feet of snow on the ground. A group of heavily-armed men found me. I don't know what they were doing, but they surrounded me before I could get away. I was backed against a tree. They were throwing all kinds of suggestive insults and horrible things at me, but throughout their bantering, I was watching you."