Back There Again

001

the mosaic muse
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Helia

My pace slowed down as I heard those screams of excitement, loud banters, soft giggles, and destructive laughs that makes everyone's ear bleed. But they won't excitements filled their whole being, no. It's the whole university.

"Calm down Helia, alam mo na laging ganito whenever it's the start of the school year" sabi ko sa sarili ko. I know it's quite normal but we can't avoid it do we? I slowed down my pace since I want to avoid the stampede that will occur at any moment. Siguro dahil na rin nakahawak ako sa kanang kamay ko yung binili kong mango shake sa thirsty stall doon sa labas nung campus.

Hinawakan ko ng mahigpit yung bag at shake ko dahil may narinig na akong sigawan sa loob ng campus. All I can share na that screams of excitement and those bands playing are on the field. Coliseum sounds so formal and fancy especially if it's the first day, and guess what? For the whole week, it's all about activities and orientations. Mag aakala siguro yung iba na the university are celebrating intramurals or foundation day.

"Kakaiba din yung pag welcome nila sa students" bulong ko sa sarili ko. I don't have the guts to talk or interact with people na kasabay ko lang mag lakad. For real, the university welcome us warmly, they approach us comfortably with these stalls, activities and events. But it's too fancy for me?

That's what influences you right?

I swallowed the big lump when I remember that line. Is it wrong to dream? Kahit ano pa kasing gawin natin there is always people who will be hurt no matter what you do. For Pete's sake, buhay ko naman ito and I know when and where to back down. Hurting one person won't make you stop achieving your dream right? No one does.

I switched lanes since yung mga kasabay ko dito sa entrance hall gate eh nagsitakbuhan na and I'm not one of them. I'm not that excited kasi since I've been overthinking what will happen to me on this occasion. Also, wala din namang attendance to indicate if you're late or not. But all I know from the email I received a month ago is that there's an attendance slip if I attended or not. It advised and needed daw for the guidance subject.

Unlucky, meron akong guidance subject kasi I'm a freshman. Required daw ito sa clearance sabi nung mga pinsan ko na nakapag-aral dito before. So sa mga seniors pwede na sila hindi pumunta dito.

"Studyload please, since wala pa kayong school ID" bungad sa akin nung head nung guard ata? I mean he's wearing a polo but he looks in a higher position- teka nga why am I even worrying about this.

I handed my study load and smiled habang they check if I were really a student. "Miss, pwede ka na pumasok".

I proceed to the field kasi nanduon yung, let's say main event. Bands are there, there are also dance performances since may nakita akong naka costumes. I know it's quite crowded but I think it's less hassle because there's a lot of people here. Knowing that they can interact with you any time pero hindi eh. You know that feeling na sa dami na nung mga tao, hindi ka na mapapansin but you won't also be branded as weird and a shut off? I love that but also maintaining myself to the community, be elegant in a way of not being too much.

Siguro member sa journalism or photography club yung mga nakikita kong nakadala ng mga camera's or they just love to take pictures. It's expected since this is a big university. The University of Eldham Farnfoss, known as one of the prestigious universities that topped inside the world ranking top 15.