Chapter 11 - Miss You

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Roseanne West

"I can't believe you drag me here again. I have other things to do." Stefan hissed as we walked into costco. I ignored him and I took one trolley for us to put things inside. I walked to the cereal section and bought 7 packs of cookie crips because it's my favorite.

"You need to stop eating cereal only, Rosie. It's not good for your body, you need to have a proper meal." Stefan said and I just gestured him to shut up.

I walked to the frozen food section and bought a lot of chicken nuggets and french fries. I dragged Stefan to the cake section too because I want cheesecake so bad.

"I always wonder why haven't you die yet because you always eat junk food.." Stefan hissed and I glared at him.

"Shut up." I said and after that I brought the trolley to the checkout section. Stefan helped me with everything and he paid for it. We walked out from costco and I put all of my food to his car. I got into his car and he drove me home.

I told him that I can take everything myself so he can go back home right away. He dropped me at the lobby and I walked inside with my hands full of plastics. I pressed the lift button and suddenly someone took some of my plastics. I turned to see Ares helping me with the plastic bags.

He didn't say anything and it made me feel so bad. I'm guessing that he's still mad for what happened last week. I mean he deserves it. The lift door opened and we both walked in. I pressed my own floor but Ares didn't press his. I was debating with myself whether I should press his floor button but I ended up not doing it. Why should I care?

When I arrived on my floor, I turned to Ares trying to take my plastic bags from his hand and he walked out from the lift first leaving me confuse. I followed him and he put the plastic in front of my door. He walked back to the lift leaving me damn guilty. Fuck him! I think he's trying to find my buttons. I pressed my passcode and walked inside my apartment.

I put everything on the table and started to put everything on their place. After finished with everything, I poured myself a glass of cold water. I drank it slowly and put the glass down.

Tomorrow is Saturday and I have to see that creature. Ugh! Why did I agree to it again? He's making me sick just by standing next to me.

My phone rang and I saw my publisher's name on the screen. I picked it up and put it on loudspeaker.


"Hey Rosie, uhmm we checked your last book and it's not as good as the last one." She said and I'm not surprised actually.

"Okay.. I'll try to edit it." I said flatly.

"Have you consider our offer for the book expo?" She asked in a careful tone.

"You know that I don't want to reveal myself, Amy. You don't need to ask me about it to know my answer." I said in a cold tone.

"Sorry.. okay. I'll send you the ticket for the book expo next week tomorrow."

"Okay." I said and ended the call. I walked into my room taking my laptop with me towards the living room. I sat down and decided to delete my draft that I sent to Amy 2 weeks ago.

I decided to write a new set of story. I sat down in front my laptop hoping idea will come out instantly but nothing. I got nothing. I hugged my knees and sighed. I turned on my speaker and turned on my favorite song from Daniel Bedingfiled.

I got up and decided to workout because maybe those ideas will come after I sweat my ass off. I started to do my usual workout and after that I let myself cool down. I took a really long shower hoping those ideas will come to me but still zero. Nothing.. I walked out from the shower and I decided to go sleep because I'm tired.

I tried to go to sleep but I can't. What's wrong with me today? I changed into my hoodie and my sweat pants. I walked out from my apartment to go to the garden beside the swimming pool. I brought my earpods with me to set the mood.

I plugged it into my ears and went down to the 5th floor. I walked out from the lift to go straight to the garden. The lights are so beautiful that I can stay here for hours enjoying the breeze.

I sat down on one of the bench there and looked up to the sky. I closed my eyes feeling the wind blowing. I sighed and opened my eyes. Loneliness is something that I always experience all the time. I know it will always be there and no one can't heal it. Even though I still have my dad and my brother, there's still a big hole inside my heart.

Carrie suggested that I need to open up to someone and I tried that already but it failed. I'm done trying and I'm tired already. I hate myself for being like this but it's better than having my heart burned into pieces.

"What are you doing here?" I turned to see Ares in his robe and I'm assuming that he just finished swimming.

"Need some fresh air." I answered without looking at him.

"It's cold.. you should go inside."

"Mind your own business." I hissed coldly.

"Tomorrow, I'll see you at 10." He said and I turned my eyes to him.

"Why so early?"

"You'll see." He said and he walked away. I sighed and pulled my legs up. I hugged my knees and closed my eyes.

"Mom.. I miss you." I said and tears left my eyes.

I want her back.. I want to turn back time just to see her smile.

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