Angel Beside Him

Author's Note

Congratulations! You have reached the end of Angel Beside Him.

It was a great ride with all of you. I started this book while struggling with my personal life, wanting to create a book out of reality, I wrote Angel Beside Him. Some of you have seen how rough our ride was but until the end, you stayed. I've had troubles that are hidden behind the scenes. But I've always been the luckiest with you guys.

I wrote Angel Beside Him in one point of view and that is the MC's pov. In reality, in our lives, we only get to see our side, our opinions, we only feel our feelings and emotions, if we ever see the other people's side or view, its because of their words or rumors but we'll never know what's really beyond that. If its real or not. Some may think, why didn't I wrote Jungkook's pov in the storyline because though it is relevant, the theme for this book is to add a touch of reality to it, and we are the only speakers of our story. Never mind the other characters, we won't know if they're saying the truth or not.

In other words, we can only understand what they display in the surface and not their insights because we are not them. I wanted for all of you to feel like you are the MC, like all of this is really happening to you.

Most of you know that Jeon Jungkook and Taehyung's personality came from the people in my real life. The truth about this book was, it wasn't supposed to be about my real life. It was supposed to be about my friends' crushes and the hope that everybody could relate but later on, I realized that Jeon Jungkook was becoming more like someone that I used to adore so much.

Through out the story, I've been getting tons of comments how they wanted Jeon Jungkook to end up with Y/n. And sadly, my Jeon Jungkook and I didn't end up together. Nor did I with my Taehyung. The plot is mixed with three guys in my life before, the one with whom I based the plot, everything turned out to be just like this book except from the confession and so on.

There used to be a guy who used to flirt with me. And I thought it was turning into something but suddenly, a girl came into the picture and became his girlfriend without me knowing but its fine, I don't like him even though he's been showing signs for a long time. Jungkook and Taehyung's personality was based on the two other guys.

I was emotionally scarred by my Jeon Jungkook. We had so much. We had so much dreams together. We had so much ahead of us. He was my safe haven. He understands my pain and knows how to handle it. We connected so much like two personalities sharing one soul. And all I needed was for him to fight for us the second time like he did before as I was battling with my depression and other mental illnesses. But he was just an angel to guide me. And he did, because when he left, I found myself here. Writing. I had the guts to finally write.

You should go say thanks to him, lol. Im kidding.

Now you might be thinking why I hinted at the end that Taehyung and Y/n ended up together even though my taehyung and I didn't end up together.

Y/n never treated Taehyung as a rebound. As her band aid. Because that wont help anything. They'd just end up with two broken hearts so she gave it a time. She gave her heart a time to move on and forget Jungkook and when she did, she gave her heart to Taehyung. The one who truly deserve it.

Because you shouldn't use and destroy someone in attempt of fixing yourself.

But sadly, that's not what I did.

Im still sixteen and I think I'm living my life to the fullest. I dont know what's the ending yet, but if I had to go back in time, I'd choose the taehyung in this book. Then, I wouldn't have any regrets. If only I gave him some time to win my heart, maybe he could've. But you know what, the only thing that's in my head that time was I didn't want to hurt him. And if we continue and I didn't feel the same way, he'll hurt even more so its better to end it before it all start.

I didn't want Y/n to commit the same mistakes that I did. So I ended up writing what could've been, the good what could've been.

Addressing them as someone's name, especially bangtan's, feels so wrong because there will always be just one Jungkook, one Taehyung and one Bangtan in this world. And in my life. Yet I couldn't expose their names. If ever this book gets discovered one day and they'll read it, you will know exactly who you are. Especially my Jungkook. Remember when I told you Im going to fix myself first, before I left you? And you told me that maybe I loved you because I needed you?

Well, here I am. Fixed yet my feelings only became more raw than ever. But you couldn't wait for me to return, you have someone else in your heart now.

But these three boys already left my life, I've already closed the door for them. But BTS will forever stay in this heart.

There's nothing wrong with loving someone, but remember not to lose yourself in the process. Remember who you are and what makes you who you are today. Learn to say no and stop them from abusing you, either physically, mentally, or emotionally.

Im so sorry to disappoint you, my dear angels. Im so sorry. But just like I said, this is the reality. And I want it to be as real as possible. I always see books as an opportunity to put a happy ending because in reality, we don't get that most of the time and I always tell myself that I'd always write books with happy ending but happy endings doesn't mean the two protagonist should end up together, happy endings are finding yourself and healing it. Happy endings are peace of mind and comfort and freedom and being yourself. I hope this book touched hearts.

And thank you for reading this. This will forever be a part of me. Thank you for watching my one step of improvement. You were the greatest part of my journey as I try to heal my self. You were there to shelter me with love. You were there who made me feel that I wasn't alone in this. Thank you for my dearest friends, you are the witness of this journey. You've seen how much I struggled to write this and how hard I try to make it to what it is now. Thank you for the assurance that I will make it, that I'll do good and better. You all are my biggest motivation in the rough road of this journey. As well as Our Bangtan.

I dedicate this book to myself, to you and to BTS. I love you so much.

Fly high, my angels. Let us spread our wings and rest in the clouds.

-Love, Rosie.

See you on Flower Boy!