𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐝𝐲 ⟿ s. harrington

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧

SHE'S NO EL !

☀︎

FOR ONCE, AFTER COUNTLESS SLEEPLESS NIGHTS, ALEX WAS FINALLY ABLE TO SLEEP THROUGH MOST OF THE NIGHT WITHOUT ANY NIGHTMARES. The comfort of being in the Byers and finally opening up about her own thoughts had been the trick. Still, it had only been most of the night— not all of it. When she had woken up, the sun had barely began to rise and the rest of the house had seemed to still be sleeping. She rubbed her eyes, walking out of Jonathans room in search of some fresh, cold air. She had tiptoed with every step and silently made her way to the front door. Settling down on the front step, she soaked in the light, chilly air that breezed by.

Not even a few moments later, the door had slowly opened, revealing Mike with his hoodie pulled up and exhaustion in his eyes. "You're awake," he whispered as he shut the door behind him. Putting his hands into his sweatshirt pockets, he had sat beside her and gave her a small, tired smile.

"It's been harder to sleep. Feels like my mind is always racing."

"And the shadow monster," he stated and when she had hung her head, he instantly felt the guilt. "I'm sorry."

"It's not you," she said as she lifted her head. She gave him a small smile to reassure him further that he was not the one that hurt her in anyway. "You know what, Mike? What you said to me when I was gone... it helped a lot but I'm afraid it won't help forever."

Mike let out a deep sigh, not sure if what he was going to say would work for her, "You just thought about the people you cared about the most and none of us will stop caring about you so you'll always have a way out."

Alex nodded her head slowly, trying her hardest to trust his word. "You're right. But the more I figure out how to help myself... the more danger I'm putting Will in."

"If it does take Will and not you, it's not your fault. Then at least we'd have another person completely sane to help Will out. You won't be so distracted."

"How is it that you're so much smarter than me?" she laughed, looking over to Mike, "Definitely smarter than Dustin," she joked, nudging him in the side. Mike's cheeks grew rosy from the cold and the compliment from Alex.

"I think a lot of people are smarter than Dustin," he laughed, looking down at his feet so Alex couldn't see how embarrassed he got. He had always felt flustered around his best friends older sister, even if she was easy to talk to.

After a few moments of silence, Alex let out a deep sigh, "I really hate this," she mumbled.

"Me too," Mike said quietly, "We'll figure it out though."

After a few minutes of comfortable silence between the two, Alex looked down at Mike, "Dustin told me that you don't like this new girl..."

"She wants to join the party," Mike grumbled. Max Mayfield had been the new girl at Hawkins Middle School and even if she had caught the others attention, she sure did not catch Mike's. To him, Max was the absolute worst as had no business being apart of the party.

Alex narrowed her eyes at him with a playful smirk, "You let me join."

"Uh, because you're Dustin's sister... and actually cool. She's-- This girl is not cool. She thinks she is but she's no El."

"I don't think there's anyone out there that's like El. I know no one out there can compare to her," Alex said, giving Mike a good nudge in the side, "I'd give her a chance though."

"You don't get it. Dustin and Lucas like her."

"You're telling me Lucas likes a girl? Lucas? Doesn't sound right. He doesn't like anyone," she laughed. Even the thought of Lucas fawning over a girl had made her mood just a bit brighter, "Either way... if they're so caught up obsessing over her... they don't like El the same way you do. Not that she'd pick those nerds over you."

"You think so?"

"Oh, I know so."

Smiling to himself, Mike had felt a bit better with a comforting talk with Alex. Being able to take her mind off of the Shadow Monster and thinking of his own girl problems, he felt another sense of accomplishment. It was a means of distraction for both and it was exactly what they needed with what was to come.

『••☀︎••』

LATER IN THE MORNING WHEN EVERYONE HAD BEEN AWAKE, ALEX HAD BEEN BACK IN JONATHAN'S ROOM BY HERSELF. The other three had been in Will's room, trying to find out where Hopper had disappeared to. Alex had been on her own mission to search her mind for any thought of where he could have gone. Joyce had told her that he had been in search of the vines that he believed the tunnels had been.

The more she had thought, the quicker she had paced the room. Her sweater she had once worn was tossed onto the bed and the tank top she had worn was still not enough to cool her off. Rubbing down her neck to fight the heat had turned her skin red and left her stomach in knots.

She had eventually flopped down onto the bed, her arms spread out and her chest rising and falling quickly. Her mind hadn't felt her own as the shadow monster had battled his way for control. Hopper's disappearance had been a set back for it as both Will and Alex had felt distracted with helping the others than helping themselves.

Her eyes squeezed shut as she tried to stay in focus but the constant memories of the demogorgan that attacked her in the Upside Down and the one in the Byers house came flooding back. Sometimes it would show her the Upside Down slug that came out of her mouth. If he felt like being funny, he would let her remember all the things that people said around her at school whenever they caught her spacing out or talking to herself. It was a cruel joke that she could never escape.

The Shadow Monster wanted her to feel isolated. He wanted to remind her that Jonathan and Nancy ran off without her, making the scar on her hand turn back into her usual nightmare instead of her bond with Jonathan. It showed her that Dustin had been extra secretive around her, not letting her go into his room or talk to her at dinner. More than anything, he loved to remind her of what she heard Billy and Steve talking about. He doesn't care about you anymore was constantly repeated into her brain whenever she tried to think of positive memories of Steve. Because no one hated Steve Harrington more than the monster that was forced to listen to the thoughts that ran through Alex's mind of the boy.

He wanted her to hate her friends— every single person that would have fought tooth and nail for her if only she had trusted them as she had before the shadow monster took control.

Alex opened her eyes, letting her hands fall back down to her side. She stood up, walking towards the window and letting it open all the way. The cold air felt so good to her. She no longer cared if Mike and Joyce felt cold anymore. Her and Will needed to feel good so the Shadow Monster could feel good too.

In her mind, the Shadow Monster had given her every reason to trust it than to ever trust anyone around her. Still, Alex had tried to fight and focus on Mike's words and how she always had them through everything. Trusting the shadow monster did not sound anything like she had wanted, but she was starting to doubt herself the more he had wiggled his way into her mind.

Giving it one last shot to trust herself over the thing in her mind, she slammed down the window. The heat had immediately resurfaced, but he was slowly pushing himself away from her. The others had been hung up on saving Hopper, that Alex had decided that saving herself and Will would be the only way to escape this never ending nightmare. All it would take was finding the two that she started with in the beginning— Jonathan Byers and Nancy Wheeler.