Azure Saviour | dark h.s.

forty nine | 49

Harry playing the piano...oh my heart.

That's kinda hot tho.

Soooo issa long one. Sorry they're getting lengthier, but there's just so much more to pack in lately. I hope that's not a bother! 

And oh! I did an interview for a lovely girl, which I was tagged by the lovely author of Stall (which is incredible btw, if you haven't read it...go do it...this is a shameless no-promo-promo). The link for the interview is on my profile if you want to check it out! Issa bit about me (maybe my name too) and other bits about AS! :) 

Another chapter of C + H and their love story, enjoy! 

S x

con·fi·dence

Céline.

A couple of weeks have passed since Harry told me what he did for a living. It was so much to take in that I didn't even know exactly how to process it all. I thought that I wouldn't be able to be around him as much after; but I surprised the both of us with the complete opposite. 

That entire day, we spent wrapped up in each other's arms as much as we could — holding him. He needed that. He needed to know that no matter what he's doing, that I'm still going to be by his side. I wanted to help him in any way that I possibly could — even though I had absolutely no idea how to do that.

Twice on that same day, I caught him crying when he made an excuse to make us some coffee or go to the bathroom. He felt guilty for some reason and I didn't understand what I was. I assumed that it had something to deal with this final job he's been assigned; that possibly he hates that he's being forced into it and doesn't want to do it. Then again, who would?

The worst case scenario, was something that I wanted to push to the very back of my mind; it was that the job involved me in some way. The way he reacted was a bit abnormal; but at the same time, that's exactly what the entire situation was.

I mean, to find out that the love of my life, currently deals drugs for a living, isn't exactly the cherry on top of a good day. Ha! I guess that is what truly define's 'good' these days apparently.

The moment he told me that if it was safer for me to be away from him, every inch of sanity that I had, snapped. As physically at it was possible, there was no way for me to be able to live my life without Harry. He's everything to me.

Whoever those two guys that wanted to kill Harry with an overdose, I personally wanted to torture them — as savage and crazy as that might sound. If it weren't for the lads, he truly would have died. He would have died thinking that he killed a man and that his entire life was utterly useless. He didn't deserve that — he doesn't deserve that.

Harry deserves all of the happiness in the world. All rainbows and sunshine, seeing the light blue sky hue that he loves so much. I remember when he told me that he didn't have a favourite colour and that black represented him. It was far from the truth. He told me everything that he wanted to believe about himself; everything about the mask he'd created to show the world.

It wasn't far that his thoughts would have led to something much greater than simply being miserable — and what would have come from it, I don't even want to think about it. Misery and Harry were two words that shouldn't ever be put anywhere near each other.

Happy. Joy. Bliss. Ecstatic. Over the moon with joy. Ma lune d'amour.

"Move in with me." Harry randomly spoke, instantaneously breaking me out of my thoughts.