Sissy Boy

•22•

Please letting me know if you spot any errors, spelling, wrong pronouns, punctuation, grammar... anything at all...

Note; Flashbacks are written in italics

"Welcome home boys" dad greeted casually from the couch.

"Thanks Harry" Aleister replied while I just quietly made my way to the stairs.

"Um Ryder?" My dad called out to me and I stopped sluggishly, looking back at him.

"Are you feeling alright, have you been-" he stopped.

"Yes dad, I have been smoking again" I monotoned impassively, jogging up the steps quickly afterwards, not failing to get a glance of his pale face.

I walked slowly to my room. My eyes were glued to the floor and my hands shoved in my pocket all with Aleister trailing behind me.

"I think you should just take a shower and rest" he suggested quietly as we entered our room.

Silently, I agreed. I tossed my bag to the side as my weak legs carried my limp body into the bathroom. After stripping, I walked under the shower head, turning on the knob, not bothering to even adjust the temperatures.

The cold water streamed down the tiny perforations before making sharp contact with my skin. Exhausted, I sighed, raising my head so the water poured all over my face.

As the water seeped out and hit me, I remembered the conversation I had with Luther earlier.

"What are you doing here I've been-" he stopped, noticing my swollen and bloodshot eyes.

"You're crying" he gasped, sitting down next to me.

"Was" I corrected as a matter of factly.

"Whatever, now tell me what happened?" He urged, his tone filled with concern.

I sighed, reaching into my bag and pulling out the piece of paper.

"Look at this" I handed it to him, giving him time to carefully look through it.

"This is your lit homework, I don't understand" I groaned, pointing to the question Aleister helped me with.

"I still don't understand, how does this explain anything?" He asked, his face squinting in confusion.

"This is what he does to me" the tears immediately burst through my already swollen eyes.

"It's Aleister... isn't it?" he sighed, speaking shakily.

"Yes, Luther" I croaked, wiping my face of the tears.

"Ryder you..." He seemed a bit pale as his lips quivered, trying to form words.

"You... You have to tell him how you feel" he whispered with a soft sigh.

"And have him hate me, no fucking way" I groaned reluctantly.

"It's the only way, man" he urged further but his eyes were shut, kinda like he was forcing himself to speak.

"What part of he'll hate me do you not understand, I've tried to kiss him once, he was so scared and I hated myself afterwards" I croaked out to him and he sighed, opening his eyes again.

"So what do you plan on doing?" He asked lowly and I sighed, fishing out my pack from my pocket.

"What I usually do so leave" I groaned, taking out my lighter as well.