"Why do you do that?"
"Do what?"
"Talk down on yourself. Every time you get frustrated with yourself you resort to talking bad about yourself."
"Those are just the words I use." I mumbled irritated at the conversation. I didn't sign up to be judged...
It's college day! Well not really, more like orientation for us freshman. I was so excited and so anxiously nauseous at the same time.
"I am freaking out. What if I don't like the people there? What if the people there don't like me? What happens if I don't get the right professors and I fail this semester? What if we don't see each other at all because of classes?"
I was hyperventilating and close to passing out in the passenger seat. Tyrie was trying to calm me down but he couldn't do much with his hands on the wheel. I just hadn't thought of how much college might be like high school. I fucking hated high school and everyone in it excluding maybe five people. I just want everything to go as planned.
Man plans and God laughs...
"Baby try to calm down for me. It would be really bad if we got there, and I had to pull you out the car in front of everyone. Breath Shunt'A. In through your nose, out through your mouth. That's it just like that baby."
I focused on my breathing. While Tyrie focused on making sure we got there on time.
"Okay, now I will tell you that you- we will be fine. You don't have to like the people at the school, and niether do they have to like you. All you need to do is give mutual respect and focus on learning. It would be nice for the both of us to make a couple friends here though. We are going to orientation, so that we both get to take the correct professors and classes. You work extra fucking hard to excell. There's no way you could fail at the dream you have had since you were in elementary. And pretty girl, we live together so we have no choice but to see each other." He said chuckling. I knew he was right though.
I let his words sink in and comfort me. His voice gave me something to cling to for protection. I grabbed his hand over the console. I was so busy freaking out I hadn't noticed the car had stopped moving.
"Oh look, we're here. Don't freak out again. Gimme kiss sexy."
He puckered his lips. He looked like the ugly duckling but of course I didn't say that out loud.
I pecked his lips three times for good luck. I briefly checked the mirror and reapplied Vaseline on my huge lips before stepping out to face the new world ahead.
Tyrie ran around holding our documents and grabbed my waiting hand. I entangled our fingers, and cracked my stiff neck. I squared my shoulders and held my chin up.
"Okay. Let's do this."
******* We had to meet our year at the 'big doors' or so they called it. That was a few minute walk from the parking lot and can I say? Woah.
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The campus was beautiful to say the least. It was so clean and very busy. Everyone around us walked with a purpose, and wore blank faces.
Can you say dead inside
"I'm so fucking ready." I said excitedly. I loved college life already. Ever since I was in elementary the sound of the struggling college life was appealing to me. I could just picture myself working hard and long nights, skipping out on parties to study to become a great vet and accomplish my dreams in the end. I guess you could say I prefer an underdog story line.
