matty healy, falling in love over night

its coming

"hey" i told him, he looked older now, his eyes were hollow and lips chapped

"hi" he weakly said back

the silence that followed in the next two minutes was long

"nice coffee shop" he commented

"i didn't know where else to meet" i shrugged

"your flat?" he asked

"i don't want to put gemma through that"

at the mention of her name i saw his skin lose colour and his eyes couldn't meet mine anymore

"yeah" he agreed

"so how have you been?" i asked not really knowing what to say

"yeah .. good. rehab was .. good i'm really in control now"

"okay" i told him bluntly

"i know you hate me but-"

"i just need to know your sober because i won't have you endangering our child"

"grace i promise"

"that word means nothing to you" i spat

"i've got notes from the therapist and i'll be seeing him weekly to check i am still sober" he said quietly

"okay" i said

"also you missed the scan" i said unbuttoning my bag and digging out the scan pictures

"here" i said sliding the picture across the table

his fingers lingered on the photos, tracing the lines and looking at her, our child

"wow" he breathed

"it's all real isn't it? like real real?"

i scoffed

"it's been real for months but you've been gone"

"i'm sorry" he said, his eyes met mine and i could see the hurt behind them. i couldn't forget what he did though, i didn't know if i could ever

"also i finally read your letter"

"only just?"

"i knew if i read it that it was for real" he said

"it was always for real"

"do you really feel that way about me?" he asked

"yes" i answered quietly

i drank the rest of my coffee before looking back at matty. i hadn't really looked at him today, if hurt. he was dressed in s black t-shirt and black jeans so no surprise there. his hair was messy and curly, but his eyes were the worst part. hollow.
god i hated him and he deserved everything he had thrown at him but ... i couldn't help feeling bad

"okay well as great as this has been, i'm going" i told him picking up my black tote back and placing it on my right arm

"grace" he pleaded trying to hold my arm

"no"

"i'm sorry" he said following me out of the cafe and into the street

"stop"

"not until you listen to my reason"

i was half way down the street when i turned to face him, i could feel my face flaming red and the wind around my legs. i started to feel uneasy but i brushed it off for the anger inside me was far larger

"YOUR FUCKING REASON? MATTY OUR WHOLE FUCKING RELATIONSHIP IS A LIE. YOU CHEATED ON ME FOR TWO FUCKING YEARS"

he stared, i knew he'd never seen me this angry, i'd never been this angry before but i was done with everything. the lies, the months of hurt not knowing and thinking he loved me and then him finally telling me he had a reason of all things. as soon as i'd said the words the world started to slip out of focus and my stomach got a terrible pain

"i know i'm a horrible shit person and i deserve nothing but please"

"i don't want to" i said, i felt sick and flustered suddenly and like i couldn't breathe

"matty go away" i mumbled holding my stomach as the sickness and sharp pains go worse

"what's wrong?" he asked sounding concerned

"call gemma" i whined

"wha-"

"CALL GEMMA"

"i don't have her number" he said calmly

i tried to breathe in through my mouth and out through my nose but it just wasn't working

"uhh p p pass me my bag" i stuttered while leaning my back against a stone wall and trying to stop the pain

"here"

i fumbled around for my phone before pulling it out and ringing gemma. it only ran for about five seconds before she picked up. god i loved her.

*phone to gemma*

"how'd it go baby?" she asked down the phone

"gemma how fast can you get into town?"

"what's happened?!" she sound all flustered and worried and i could here her picking up the car keys

"i don't know" i mumbled

"my stomach hurts and i feel sick and shaky gem"

"is matty there?"

"yes" i mumbled not looking him in the eye

"okay i need to speak to him" she said

"gemma no- please don't"

"baby it's what's best for you, pass the phone"

i took a deep breath before telling matty gemma wanted to talk to him, he took my phone and mumbled in agreement at everything she said

all of a sudden i felt a gushing of water and i daren't look down

"no god no" i mumbled

matty told gemma to cut to the hospital as he hung up the phone and began to ring another

"i'm calling the ambulance okay?" he said using my phone to dial 999

"i want gemma there" i cried, he bent beside me and wiped my hair out of my eyes

"don't do that" i told him

a crowd had started to gather at this point, i mean i was 9 months pregnant and about to give birth on a road

"space" i mumbled once matty had gotten off the phone to the ambulance

"back off, give her some air" matty yelled, instantly everyone cleared the way

i'd sat down at this point with my back slumped against a wall

"what is i can't do it?" i cried into my hands

"do what?"

"give birth or or or be a mum?"

"if anyone can you can"

"i already hurt so much"

"i know" he mumbled

i rested my head in my hands and wished the world away.

before i knew what was happening everything was dark and i was being talked to, i soon came round to see gemma and matty. gemma holding my hand and matty biting his nails in the corner. gemma wouldn't look at him. i didn't blame her

"you have to push" a young nurse with her hair scraped into a bun told me

gemma nodded before repeating the words, her hand still on mine

"push"