Brooklyn Nine-Nine

24 | Lorelei & Assists

Hoseok walked into the precinct with dark circles under his eyes. He was sluggish even though he was on his third cup of coffee. His eyes looked sunken and if it weren't for the fact that Yoongi was dragging him in, he would've collapsed onto the floor.

"Thanks for helping me in," Hoseok mumbled, stifling a yawn.

"I had no choice; you held me at gunpoint."

"Sarge, you good?" Jungkook asked, looking concerned. He typed WebMD in the search tab just in case.

"Whoa, have you gotten any sleep?" Taehyung asked, rolling around in his chair. Hoseok shook his head. "Why?"

Hoseok narrowed his eyes. "Jimin."

━━━━━━━━

It was the twenty-fifth day in a row that Jimin had threatened to take Hoseok's job by force (which usually meant a fatal end for Hoseok). His most recent threat involved telling everyone that Hoseok was dead so he could take his job.

"Jimin, why did my mother get a call from the funeral service?" Hoseok asked.

Jimin turned to him, a bright smile on his face. "Oh! Sarge, you're alive!" he exclaimed, his voice laced with disappointment. "You left your phone on your desk so I assumed you died."

A delivery man brought a bouquet of chrysanthemums into the precinct. "Delivery for Park Jimin's funeral service for Jung Hoseok."

━━━━━━━━

All eyes turned to Jungkook, who was listening intently. He looked at everyone, feeling immediately singled out once he registered their accusatory stares.

"Jimin's your boyfriend," Yoongi said. "Do something."

Jungkook held his hands up. "I don't claim him."

"Basically, he scared me to the point where I can't sleep at all. Nothing has worked," Hoseok said. "As much as I want to, I can't fight insomnia. The pills don't help either."

Yoongi and Jungkook pondered over a possible solution to make Hoseok sleep as Taehyung played on his phone. Jimin walked into the precinct and they all stiffened up, hoping that he wouldn't have another interaction with Hoseok.

"Oh, Jimin," Taehyung said, raising his phone up and turning up the volume for everyone else to hear. "This is a new one, right?"

"Oh! Is that your new cover?" Jungkook asked. "I still don't understand why you go by Lorelei—"

Jungkook was cut off by a loud snore. Hoseok had collapsed onto his desk and was in deep sleep, a small smile painted on his lips. It seemed to be because of Jimin's singing. Yoongi and Jungkook stared at Hoseok and then looked at Jimin, who didn't seem to be surprised at all.

"Lorelei was a siren who used to lure sailors to their deaths with her beautiful voice," Jimin said. "God gave me this talent for a reason."

"To kill?" Yoongi asked.

"I mean, I'm going to hell for being gay anyways."

━━━━━━━━

"It's rare for you to assist on arrests, Captain," Jin said, parking his car in a hidden area. "Especially when all we have to do is wait for the perp."

Namjoon shrugged. "I like to keep notes on my officers."

"What are your notes on me?"

Namjoon pulled up the Notes app on his phone. "Would not hesitate to strip my clothes off; wants to get in my pants; likes my chest; could not possibly betray me for he is probably obsessed with me, and hopefully doesn't still have a thumbtack stuck up his ass," he read off.

"Accurate."

"Do you still have a thumbtack up your ass?" Namjoon asked.

Jin glanced at him out of the corner of his eye. "Would you like to find out?"

━━━━━━━━

Hoseok stifled a yawn as he stirred from his sleep. He rubbed at his eyes and looked much fresher than he had been for the past few weeks. He fixed his hair and checked the clock to discover that he had been asleep for the past five hours. He remembered the euphoric voice he heard and a small smile crossed his face again.

"Sarge, you're awake," Jungkook said, grabbing Yoongi and Taehyung's attention as well.

Hoseok rubbed his eyes with his fists. "For some reason, when I heard that voice, I got sleepy in seconds. It's so entrancing and therapeutic," he said. "Can you please tell me where to find more of that music?"

Jungkook and Yoongi exchanged a horrified look, not knowing how to tell Hoseok that Jimin was the one who gave him insomnia and the one who knew how to make him sleep.

Taehyung leaned closer to Jungkook. "So Jimin's voice puts him to sleep but he's the reason for his stress?"

Jungkook nodded blankly and gulped. "Sarge, I'll send you the link but you should know something."

"What is it?" Hoseok asked.

"Well—"

Jimin walked into the room and Hoseok let out a yelp, curling into a fetal position in his chair.

"Yeah, let's not," Yoongi finished for Jungkook.

━━━━━━━━

"Okay, so the thumbtack isn't there," Namjoon said, getting back into the front seat.

"Captain, are you sure you checked properly?" Jin asked.

"Quit fooling around, we need to catch the perp—"

Jungkook's voice rang into the speaker. "Captain, I don't know what you're doing, but the perp is at the bank on the east side, not the west side."

Namjoon and Jin shared a look.

"Fuck," Jin muttered, flooring the vehicle. "This is such Taehyung behavior."

━━━━━━━━

"Are we going to tell Hoseok about Jimin's singing?" Yoongi asked, looking worriedly at the Sergeant.

Hoseok was scrolling through Jimin's music, adding the most relaxing ones to his playlist. He put in his earphones and collapsed into his arms, falling asleep in seconds.

"We should," Jungkook said and brought his finger to his nose. "Not it," he added quickly.

Yoongi glared at him. "Fuck you."

━━━━━━━━

"Jungkook saved our asses this time," Jin said, handcuffing the perpetrator. "But let's not tell him that."

"No, we won't," Namjoon agreed, knowing well that Jungkook would be very cocky about it.

"So, was that a one-time thing or a two-time thing?" Jin asked. "Or maybe even a multiple-time thing?"

"Can't say for sure," Namjoon said. "How about dinner instead?"

"My ass or actual food?" Jin asked for clarification and laughed when Namjoon gave him an annoyed look. "Okay, okay, how about tonight?"

"No."

"Tomorrow?"

"I'm busy."

"The day after?"

"Precinct meeting."

Jin let out all the air in his lungs out at once. "This weekend?" he asked in desperation.

Namjoon chuckled. "Sure."

━━━━━━━━

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Which chapter was your favorite so far?