Hidden Wounds

Part 22

"You want something to eat?" Gray asked me as we left his precinct. It was the day after I left the hospital, when I saw my baby laid out like that I couldn't handle it; they took the picture but I wasn't there. I was waiting for the funeral home to contact me about the cremation. Call me crazy but I was gonna put my daughters ashes in a locket and hang it around my neck. 
It was the closest I would ever get to her again. She was so pretty, she favored Anthony a lot but she had curls like me, and full lips like mine. I kept her picture in my wallet. I had stayed at a bullshit motel  last night and from the looks of it I would be staying another night. I didn't have anywhere to go and lucky for me my cards were still charging. Gray had called me this morning, we met with the officer from the hospital, Reyes. He let us know that Anthony had been put on a "no bail" hold. When he ran off that night he actually got caught speeding, but he matched the description the police had out, the one Gray had already put in before he came to the house. which I didn't even know about. Popped his trunk and found something more interesting than a domestic violence case. Turns out Gray's drug hunch was right, Anthony had kilos in his trunk! They were packaged up nice, looking like they were ready to be dropped off. I didn't even have to open my mouth about it, they were already on it. Gray let it be known that my case was the basis of Anthony's arrest, and the drug ties would be the added bonus. After making my statement on him Reyes told us he would be in contact. I didn't know why I got the feeling that he wasn't interested in my part of the story anymore, but I let it be. To be honest the past twenty-four hours had been hard for me. I couldn't sleep, I always ended up in some fucked up dream; either I was dying or I was hearing a baby crying but could never find the actual child. I didn't know what the dreams meant, but they scared the shit out of me and after a few of them I wasn't interested in sleeping. 

"Lina, you hungry?" Gray asked, we had reached our cars. 

"I'm good. You think Reyes is gonna stay on my case and not just jump on the drug charges?" I asked, I needed to know now. I wasn't trying to waste my time, I wanted him to get a real sentence. 

"I'ma make sure of it." Gray looked at me like I was crazy. "That nigga is gonna pay for what he did to you and your baby." the conviction in his tone set me at ease a little bit, but I made a mental note to look for a lawyer. I wasn't going to trust the police department with shit. I sighed and pushed my hair back, I hadn't bothered brushing it, my appearance was the least of my worries.

"I hope so." I mumbled, I was ready to go back to the hotel and sleep the rest of the day away. I needed some liquor to knock me out so I wouldn't have the nightmares.

"I know so." he replied immediately, "What's up with you? Yesterday you were ready to do this..." he let his sentence trail off but I didn't respond. "You having second thoughts?"

"No." I answered stiffly, "I just want to know I'm not wasting my fuckin' time. That punk ass nigga deserve this." I was bitter towards Anthony, All those feelings of love? Left that shit at the house that night. I wanted that nigga in a jail cell, bent over being turned into someone's lil' bitch. I wanted someone to control, demean and dominate him the way he did me. See how he liked it.

"Alright then, it's going to happen. Just need you to be all in." he stated. I watched him watch me, he was examining my face trying to see what was really on my mind.

"I'm in." I replied shortly, then  I unlocked the doors on my car. Who knew how long I would have this. "I'll catch you later Gray." 

"Zaire." he said

"Excuse me?" 

"Well, that's my first name. You been calling by my last for months now." he chuckled, I could see he was trying to lighten the mood and I appreciated him for that, but today was not the day. I just wanted to sleep.