Chapter 21 - Our Happiness or Their Happiness?

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Jacob William

"Why are you here.. in the middle of the night?" I turned to see Catherine holding her cup before she sat beside me putting her legs into the pool too.

"I can't sleep." I wasn't lying, there's a lot going on inside my head.

"The wedding?"

"Yeah and some work." I nodded as I looked up to the sky. The moon shined brightly tonight and it made me a little calm for some reasons.

"You can tell me if you have something in mind." I turned to her and she smiled nodding as she raised her cup a little. I turned back looking at the pool with the reflection of the moon on it.

"I'm fine, I just can't sleep."

"I'm a little bit curious, how did you end up in the mafia world?" I knew she will ask me this topic one day and I chuckled.

"It was just weeks after my parents passed away. I was trying to distract myself from the grieve of my parents passing away by going to the clubs getting drunk and basically just trying to fight people when Kristopher found me." I sighed remembering everything again inside my head.

"He was offering me work and I accepted it without knowing that it was a really dirty work." Catherine put her hand on my shoulder patting it and I turned to her.

"I met Ian and Lucas there. We were trained to be a mafia in Russia and at that time my grandfather thought that I died already because everyone thought that someone killed me and buried my body somewhere but I wasn't. We trained for 1 year when it slowly killing me because the grieve still there. I was becoming a monster at that time and Kristopher loved my spirit."

"But as the time goes by.. He loves Ian and Lucas more because they obviously older, smarter and stronger than me. I started to have a lot of mental breakdowns and Lucas saw that. He started to send letters to my grandfather to arrange my freedom. After almost 2 years, Lucas helped me to runaway and my grandfather was the one who picked me up. He was so happy to see me again after thinking that I was dead."

"Kristopher hated the fact that Lucas helped me to runaway but my grandfather gave him millions and Lucas got a lot of punishment because of me. I owed him a lot that's why I helped him after he successfully killed Kristopher and comeback to the US as a free man." I smiled remembering when I hugged Lucas in Seatle. He was my savior and I owed him a lot.

"Everything happens for a reason and it's not your fault." She said and I laughed dryly.

"Even you were afraid of me.."

"I didn't know what to expect, I mean.. I never thought my future husband used to be a mafia." I smiled hearing that 3 words 'my future husband'.

"Killing isn't in my blood, he trained me to be one but I can't do it myself." I said truthfully.

"I believe you, you're just cruel when you work.. that's all I know." I chukled and turned to her. He tilted my head a little bit seeing her looking up to the sky with the moonlight shining on her.

"We're going to get married soon.. how do you feel?"

"I don't know actually, never in my life that I would imagine to get married with someone that I don't love." She said as she looked down to the pool.

"Did you love Eden?" I asked curiously.

"I did, I thought we will spend the rest of our lives together but I was wrong." She let out a dry laugh.

"He's a d**k then." I said simply and she turned to me chuckling.

"How about you? You never found love? Not even once?" She asked as she raised her eyebrows and I shook my head.

"I was busy working and I don't think I'm capable to be a boyfriend or a husband.. let alone be a dad." I laughed.

"You never know because you never try." She said as she leaned her head to my shoulder looking up to the sky.

"We're not backing out from this marriage right?" I asked her.

"No.. you?"

"Why do we get married in the first place when we will end up having a divorce later?" I asked after thinking about Ian and Nate's words. Catherine sat up straight and turned to me.

"We want to make the elders happy and if our relationship doesn't work out.. we can tell them the truth." She said.

"You were crying a few days ago because you changed your mind.. what's with you today?" I looked at her confuse and she sighed.

"To be honest, I don't know what I want. We do deserve to find our happiness and find the one by ourselves but.. we don't have a choice." She said and I nodded.

"Do you still want Eden?"

"No." I was happy to hear that answer for some reasons and I leaned slowly to her. Our lips met and I slipped my hand to her cheek to deepen the kiss. I hugged her and she circled her arms around me.

"You okay?" She asked as she patted my back.

"Yeah." No.. I'm debating what should I do at the point for our happiness and for our future.

"I think you're tired, you should go to sleep." She said and I chuckled.

"You too, we're awake at dawn." I said as I caressed her hair.

"Come on.. let's go." She released the hug and I nodded. I got up and then I helped her to get up. She took her cup and we walked inside the house. She put the cup into the sink and we walked upstairs together. She was going to her room but I caught her hand.

"Do you want to.. sleep together? Not in that way.." I said and she nodded. We walked into my room and fell asleep in each others arms right away.

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