I walk into the hospital, the giant knot in my stomach feeling bigger and bigger with each step I take.
Louis' letters always came about a week after he's written them. He probably didn't tell me about cancer for awhile. He's probably known for about three weeks. Three weeks and I just got here this morning.
I walk up to the front desk and clear my throat to get the attention of the receptionist. Her warm eyes turn to me and I whisper out Louis' name. She gives me a sympathetic smile and tells me his room number in the same hushed voice I spoke to her with. I just nod and let my feet carry me away.
The trip up to his floor and down the hall is eerie. I've never been a fan of hospitals, one of the many reasons I chose law over medicine. The smell of bleach burns my nose and the sounds of the dying people laugh or cry sends shivers down my spine. Louis' room is 567.
I knock on the door and I can hear his voice telling me to come in. His voice sounds softer than last time, more gentle and weak. It makes me want to rip my heart out and sob because he's always been strong and loud.
I open the door and peak in to see my beautiful boy lying on the white hospital bed. His blue eyes move to meet mine and I rush over to his bed, stumbling over my long legs. He chuckles as I trip, but I cut him off by kissing his chapped lips.
"Baby," I croak out, my fingers running down his cheek, to his neck. He closes his eyes at my touch and let's out a tiny breath.
"I'm feeling okay today, H. Do you just want to lie in bed and watch movies? I'm not into doing much else," Louis says, avoiding the topic he knows will come up. I humour him for now and crawl into the bed, letting him curl up on my chest.
"I missed you," Louis whispers as he plays with my fingers that rest on his stomach. I bury my face into his thinning hair and close my eyes to hide away my tears.
"I missed you too. I love you so much," I tell him again. I plan on telling him that everyday.
"Love you too. Love you too," Louis murmurs sleepily.
