Farce Effect

Chapter 1

Author Notes:

If you had read this work previously, do bear in mind that I have switched the POV to Garrus'. I will be continuing in this fashion from now on.

Disclaimer: Believe it or not, I do not actually own Mass Effect, so yeah...don't sue me please.

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Chapter Premise:

Commander Caleb Shepard presents evidence in the Citadel Council Chambers to a reluctant Council of Saren Arterius' defection, in light of Nihlus Kryik's murder. It's clear that to sway them, Shepard must employ his renowned intelligence and diplomacy, certainly no problem for the man often considered humanity's finest Spectre candidate.

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"DIE, YA UGLY BASTARD!"

Commander Caleb Shepard yelled these words as eight hastily-fired rounds from his Elkoss pistol hit squarely in the face of a smug Saren Arterius...and sailed right through, ricocheting off the wall behind him. Lieutenant Kaiden Alenko gingerly spoke up from behind him.

"Commander, I believe that's a video projection of Saren, not his actual body."

"I...know, Lieutenant. Don't give me technicalities."

"I know. It's just that you tend to forget that, so I wanted to make sure you--"

"Kaiden. Just...go and wait in the cab."

"But Commander, I--"

"Now."

The disheartened Alenko looked first to the visibly annoyed Citadel Councilmembers, then to the red hologram projection of the disgruntled Saren Arterius to his left, and then to the apathetic Chief Ashley Williams to his right for support. Finding none, he quietly shuffled off down the Citadel's Council Chamber steps, where he eventually found a Citadel Rapid Transit-owned X3M shuttle to flag down.

Alenko left the scene of a trial more momentous than those in attendance even realized. The rafters were packed with spectators of nearly every advanced Council Space race, consisting mostly of the wealthy and Citadel politicians. They witnessed the scene where our story starts, where Commander Caleb Shepard was to prove to the Council standing before him of the treacherous Saren Arterius' sacrilege of his own Spectre title, following the death of fellow Spectre Nihlus Kryik at his hands back on Eden Prime, the site of a controversial geth appearance. Surely, the task was child's play for the man slated to become humanity's Spectre, a title bestowed only on those possessing prowess and intelligence of the highest echelon.

The momentous trial in question resumed when the agitated Asari Councillor cleared her throat before addressing the Commander.

"Mr. Shepard--"

"Commander."

"Commander, must I warn you again of the Council Chamber's policies on the unwarranted use of firearms?"

"Don't listen to 'em, Skipper," chimed in Chief Williams. "It's just another one of the aliens' ploys to take away our guns"

"I don't think that's what this is about," mentioned the worried Salarian Councilor.

"1776 WILL COMMENCE AGAIN IF YOU TRY TO TAKE OUR FIREARMS."

"Spirits, damn that Ajex Lones," the Turian Councilor muttered to himself.

The ever-patient asari sighed and began again.

"Mr. Shepard--"

"Commander."