Chapter 23: Surviving

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"I am through surviving. It's time for me to live."

                                                                  -Anonymous

Alive.

A word used to describe something that is in a state of living.

Living.

Most people consider living to be the same as surviving...they believe that as long as you are breathing- as long as you are able to wake up every day...then you are, indeed, living.

But, in reality...There is a large difference between the two.

Surviving is being able to make it through the day without having a breakdown. Surviving is being in a constant state of worry and numbness. Reliving the same cycle day after day and hoping that something will change.

Living is being happy. Being able to laugh without fearing what is going to come. Living is waking up everyday with a sense of freedom and liberty. It was beautiful to think about.

Surviving is merely being able to walk.

While living....is being able to fly.

You were once able to live...but now...You were simply surviving.

You body shivered as the cold rain poured down on you from the gray sky above.

The freezing liquid mixed with your hot tears that slid down your cheeks, but you didn't even bother to wipe it away...

You could hear Hoseok's voice calling out to you from behind, but you didn't respond...You couldn't bring yourself to talk to him...not after what he had just told you- not after what just happened.

You slowly moved your hand up to touch your cheek. You could still feel the cold air that hit your face when Jin tried to touch you.

You honestly didn't know that you could do whatever it is that you did...but you weren't going to complain..the last thing you wanted was for him to have any sort of contact with you...

His tear-filled eyes flashed through your mind, causing your stomach to churn and your chest to tighten uncomfortably.

You wished that you were a better person..Maybe then, you would be able to see his side of the story and forgive him...but you weren't a better person..You were human and you had emotions too...

Even if his actions were somehow noble, you couldn't find it within yourself to trust him anymore...He was a liar..and he betrayed you.

After everything the two of you had been through-all the memories the two of you had made...

Clearly, they meant nothing to him.

"Oracle?"

Your blue eyes snapped up to stare at the man that had called out to you.

Jimin stood underneath the awning of the palace, his brows furrowed in confusion as he stared at you standing in the pouring rain.

He wasn't wearing the usual red robes of the Emperor, instead, he wore an over-sized white shirt and black trousers. His red hair was messy and tousled, as if he had been running his hands through it.

You couldn't stop the quiet cry that left your lips as you stared at him.

Looking at him brought back so many emotions.

You knew that he wasn't the Jimin you had grown accustomed to. You knew that he wasn't either version of the sweet man you once knew...but looking at him made you want to do nothing more than run to him and embrace him...You wanted to hear him say that everything would be okay...as he had done in the previous worlds.

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