Far From Home Two: The Monster's Heir-- a M/M/M fantasy romance

30-- Never Wanted Something More

*****Writing this chapter was.... fun ;);)*****

LLYRIC—

It hurt me that my actions had strained Ember and Sage's relationship so badly. Despite this, their care and attention towards me made me preen and want to demand more.

Always more. It was never enough. Never enough kisses. Never enough love. Never enough touches.

I needed them like I would stop breathing if they weren't there.

Maybe that made me weak. Maybe that was wrong, to so heavily depend on others. But I figured, I deserved it. I had lived my life in darkness and pain. Maybe it was time someone else held me up a little, helped me carry the pain and darkness. And Sage and Ember seemed ready and more than willing, so I wouldn't complain. I wouldn't hold back. I would embrace them and their support, and be weak if that's what it made me. I'd be weak and happy, and that was ok with me.

My horror when I had woken after I had blacked out and prayed to never wake again had died out as Sage— loyal, faithful Sage— had thrown Ember against the wall and fought for me. He fought for me. Me, the Monster's heir. A man no one should feel anything but disgust or pity for.

And then Ember had called me his mate, and for the first time I had hope. Hope I would live. Hope I could be loved. Hope everything would work out and destiny would prevail.

When Al'iya finally declared me healthy enough to leave the little cot I had slept in for near two weeks, I was grateful to return to Ember's rooms, his bed. I lay down that first night with a stiff Ember on one side, and a pouting, tense Sage on the other. Ignoring their protests, I sat up and pulled away from them. I stared deep into Sage's eyes, then Ember's, before grabbing them both by the hand. I forced their hands into the other's and sat back as they sheepishly looked at each other.

For two weeks, they'd treated each other with gloves so they didn't upset me. I knew that, and I knew the reason why. Sage had refused to tell me, telling me to worry about my healing, and everything else could wait, so I had asked Tristan when he came in to assist Al'iya in checking on my wounds.

Tristan had explained that Ember had read the letter from the queen of El'kahr, which had explained my heritage, and Ember had initially reacted badly. I couldn't blame him that. He had moved past it, and was now treating me as if I were precious and adored and loved. I wasn't surprised in the least his first thoughts were of disgust.

But that initial reaction had angered Sage, and I understood why. My men were supposed to be partners, two thirds of a whole, but they were the strong ones, the walls of strength that held me up. Sage had relied on Ember to help me heal and cope, had relied on him for food and a place to stay, for safety and security. And Ember had torn that trust Sage had given him.

That couldn't have been easy for my big man. 

"I don't know if I can trust you again," Sage said to Ember, his voice near a whisper as he moved to pull from Ember's hold. But Ember held him and refused to let Sage's hand from his grip. "I've been betrayed, cheated, deceived... but I've never felt that way before. I've never been betrayed that deeply before.

"That you were able to so easily throw away both of us, like yesterday's trash... How can I trust this— this relationship— build a life with you, if I'm on edge that someday you'll get angry and we'll be forced to leave our life behind on your whim?"

Ember's eyes filled and he dug his face into the pillows beneath his head, groaning. I sat back, my body protesting my kneeling position.

"I'm sorry, Sage. I have... I have no words." Ember shook his head and pulled up, scooting towards Sage and reaching up to cup his face. "I have no excuse, and can give nothing but my word and my heart. I love you, Sage, and I'm so sorry I made you suffer in any way. I'm so sorry I betrayed your trust, and I'm sorry I betrayed Llyric."