sugar baby [h.s]

twenty three

"Would you like a drink?" Harry asks as the elevator arrives at his floor and we both head in the direction of the kitchen.

"Yes please" I mumble quietly as I take a seat at one of the bar stools while Harry opens the fridge and takes out two wine glasses. I probably should have started drink when we were at the cinema, it would have been good to have had a little liquid courage in this scenario. But then I guess I didn't know that this is where the evening was going to go until it just, happened.

"Are you nervous?" Harry asks as he slides my glass towards me and I wrap my fingers around the stem gently. His eyes peer down at me as he leans himself against the side of the island counter. I shrug my shoulder and lift the glass up to my lips and take a sip.

"We don't have to do this, there is no pressure on you. If you don't feel comfortable..."

"No, I want to. It's just, it's a little nerve wracking" I admit quietly as I cut him off mid-sentence. To his credit, Harry has been very patient with me and my lack of experience since we met. I've felt comfortable to explore this new side of intimacy without feeling pushed or rushed into doing anything I didn't want to do.

"Yes, the first time can be a little bit scary. Which is why you I don't want you to think that this is something I need you to do." He continues to softly reassure me.

"What if I'm not good" I keep my eyes laser focused on the glass of wine in my hands as I make the admission. This is what I'm truly afraid of; what if somehow I'm terrible at having sex and he isn't going to want me anymore? It's my first time so I don't even know how to be good at it, what if I do it wrong. Of course I've had the general sex talk growing up and I've seen sex scenes in movies and tv shows, but that is the extent of my knowledge. My head rises as I hear a soft chuckle emanating from Harry's lips.

"Baby that's ridiculous, you are not going to be bad at it" He dips his head down lower and tucks a loose piece of hair behind my ear. The subtle contact sizzles against my skin, even the softest touch from him is all it takes to leave me wanting more.

"How could you know that?" I ask him as I take another gulp of my wine. Wish this liquid courage would start kicking in because I could really use some right about now.

A soft smirk is curled onto Harry's lips as he responds. "Well, if you're half as good as sex as you are at grinding then I think we are in pretty good shape"

I snort a half laugh half yelp as I bury my head in my hands, his choice of words both mortifying and humouring me. I hear him softly chuckle before he places his hands over my own and I feel him press a kiss into the top of my head.

"It's the truth love, you did a fine job then I'm sure tonight will be no different" I can feel his smirk I don't even need to look at him to know it's there. When I do remove my hands from my face, he's lowered himself down to leaning his elbows on the counter watching me intently with that gentle smirk.

"Do you trust me?" He narrows his eyes gently as I smile shyly at him. I nod my head slowly. He softly grins at my response before he continues. "Everything is going to be okay, I promise you"

It's like his words are the magic cure, the answer to my prayers. As my self doubt begins to dissipate around me, leaving only him and I behind. For some strange reason this moment feels so right for us. It feels like we've come so far, and it's been clear tonight just how good this could all potentially be.

He wants me, I'm not an employee or an object at his disposal. I'm his girlfriend; who he surprises at school with sweet date proposals and delicately kind words. And I am myself; dressed down in jeans and a sweater with minimal makeup on. I feel beautiful when he looks at me, like I'm worthy of being with someone as extraordinary as him.