Weak | S.R

Spencer

"We should probably head back," Allie suggests after we've been looking out at the ocean in silence for nearly twenty minutes.

We found a bench to sit at and Allie snuggled up to me as we listened to the waves.

Today has been stressful. I'd wanted to leave the BAU because of the JJ situation, but Allie talked me out of it. She gave me a fresh point of view and helped me realize that there is a way I can work through it.

I didn't expect her to travel all the way here to see me, and even though the unsub had a list he was keeping to, I didn't want Allie to get caught up in it somehow. I asked her to not leave the hotel, and she did so happily.

"Just... a little longer," I stand up, walking up to the railing and looking over. "I'm really enjoying not having to think about anything but you."

I hear her chuckle. "Okay, just tell me when you're ready."

Out of the corner of my right eye, I see her take the space next to me, looking over the edge at the seemingly pitch black water.

"I wish we could just freeze time and stay here in this moment for awhile, y'know?"

She leans her head on my shoulder and links her left arm with my right. "Let's make it last, yeah?"

I nod in assent. "Let's make it last."

After a few minutes, Allie yawns and tries to silence it by bringing her hand up to her mouth. She's tired, so am I. We should head back.

"Come on, honey. Let's head back, okay?" I step away from the railing, gently tugging on her arm to bring her with me. "You're tired."

Allie just gives me a guilty look. "No, no! If you want to stay longer, I'm okay!"

"I don't, Al. I'm tired, too. Can you grab us one of those cabs you get on your phone?" I ask her with a smile. "An Uber?"

She grins and nods. "Sure, babe."

Once we get back to the hotel, change into sleep clothes and hop into bed. Allie lets out a small sigh after we've been laying there for a few minutes, having already said 'goodnight' and 'I love you' to each other.

"Spence?" She whispers. "Are you asleep?"

"No," I whisper back. "What's wrong, Al?"

"I was just thinking about... Do you remember when we had sex on your desk at school?"

I chuckle. "How could I forget? Why are you thinking about that?"

"I don't know, I'm just thinking," She tells me quietly. "Just... remembering."

"That was fun," I smile to myself, remembering it.

"I just realized that... that's the last time we had sex,"  Her tone of voice changes from the slightly seductive tone it'd been to a sad tone.

"We had sex in New York, Allie," I tell her, trying to make her feel a little bit better.

"Real sex, Spence," She sighs.

"Sex is the stimulation of genitals for pleasure, so... by that definition, we did-"

"Babe, you know what I mean..." She sighs. "I'm sorry that I'm not... y'know."

I sit up and turn the lamp beside me on, filling the room with a yellow glow. "Allie, don't say you're sorry. There's nothing to be sorry about."

She doesn't make eye contact with me. "I just... do you remember how I said that if you needed to see other people..."