The Good Girl Plays the PLAYER

Chapter 36

I couldn't have slept for long when I was rudely awoken by the sound of something hitting my bedroom window. Fucking kids doing their paper round, thinking it's funny to do shit like that, waking me up at the crack of dawn, or at least that's what it feels like it is. I lazily climb out of my bed, draw the curtains open and look out my window. I expected to see those little runts on their bikes ready to make a dash for it but instead I saw a familiar face that I didn't expect to see so soon. Liam was outside, waving at me to open the door downstairs, but instead, I hid behind my curtains, clutching my chest as my heart pounded painfully. I knew deep down he didn't mean all those mean things he said and I knew he would come to regret it, but I didn't expect him to come to my home so soon, especially when my brother is so mad at him. Has he lost he's mind? Does he have a death wish? Does he want my brother to get even more pissed off?

Standing here in hiding was not going to give me any answers and so I quietly leave my room and head downstairs to the front door. I didn't think to check what I looked like in the mirror as my appearance didn't even cross my mind nor did it seem important right now, all I could think about was to see him hear his voice and avoid getting him caught by my brother. I took a deep breath just before opening the door, then turned the latch.

There he was in all he's glory, tired, in the same clothes as last night and still hot as ever. I didn't give him the chance to speak, nor to come into my home; all I did was drag him to the side of the house and out of sight. "What the hell are you doing here?" I whisper shout with a stern voice. "I... I um... I came to apologise!"  He said nervously with his head hanging low. "You shouldn't be here, you need to leave!" I say coldly. I didn't mean for it to sound that way, but his presence here makes me nervous and I have no idea how he's going to be. He'll apologise and then probably bite my head off in the next second or two.

"I know I shouldn't, but I had to see you! I want to apologise about last night and explain!"  I stand there in front of him probably looking rather blank, but I sincerely don't know how else to look at him. "No need to explain, I understood perfectly last night, so can you leave now?" What is wrong with me? Why am I being so mean? I know he didn't mean any of that stuff and I was going to forgive him, so why am I being this way? "Nichole, I'm sorry! I really am!" I wave my hand dismissively, not wanting to hear it, but he speaks again regardless. "I didn't mean any of those things I said to you, you have to believe me!"  I scoff and turn away from him, unable to listen to his request. The irony is that I had wanted that same curtsey, but he never granted it to me and now, here he stands wanting me to believe him? Well I do, but he makes it damn hard and I guess that's why I'm being difficult with him. He does nothing but go out of his way to hurt me and lie to me all the time so why should I go easy on him? Maybe my brother is right, maybe I should let him stew and reflect on his errors.

"Nichole please! I'm telling you the truth this time! As soon as you left, I regretted every single word and came after you, but you were gone, long gone. I looked for you for ages and when I couldn't find you, I called your brother for help!"  That's why Derrick was out so late. He was looking for me because he knew. "You called him, so what? You want a medal now?" I finally answer back venomously. I had hoped he'd come after me and it makes me happy that he did even though he never found me, but he has no idea how frightened I was last night and how I never want to feel that way again.

"No of course not! I did it because I was worried about you! I never should have let you leave in the first place!"  " You got that right!" I mumble under my breath. "You're really pissed aren't you?" He says now looking like he's been defeated by some foe. "You think?" I whisper shout while feeling the sting in my eyes, tears threatening to spill yet again over this boy whom I'm so in love with. I don't want to be angry with him, nor do I want to be mean, but he really hurt me and he needs to understand that I will not put up with it. I will not be he's doormat.