SHUT UP! jenzie

nineteen

I LAZILY GET UP FROM MY COUCH TO see who rang the doorbell. i dragged my feet across my living room. i swing my door open as my eyes meet with the one and only,

johnny orlando

he grins widely inviting himself inside.
"what are you doing here?" i ask as he hugs me and lifts me up. that catches me quite off guard

"i wanted to see you" he puts me down.

we walk over to my living room, "you look really pretty" johnny says shyly.

i crease my eyebrows then laugh, i'm wearing an old ripped band t-shirt with sweatpants

"sure" i joke

for a while me and johnny talked and watched tv. his head is on my lap and i'm running my fingers through his dirty blonde hair. his eyes are glued to the tv, we're watching friends.
i start thinking on what's going to happen between me and johnny.

i can't forget what he's done in the past. a few months ago he was the biggest fuck boy and i need to know if he won't play me like the other girls.

he raises his head to look at me. i look down at him and give him a soft smile.

"is everything okay?" he reassures

"yeah... just thinking"

"want me to take your mind off it?" he questions as he sits up beside me, pulling me into his lap. wow deja vu.

he unexpectedly kisses me neck. i let out a shakey breath, he notices and looks at me.

"i know something's bothering you"

his eyes are wide and confused, our faces are so close. if either one of us were to move an inch forward. we'd be kissing.

"it doesn't matter" i shrug as i lean in. surprisingly he stops me.

"tell me what happened" he says gently.

"do you care?" i ask confused.

"yes?" he affirmed.

"okay, well..."

"well what?"

"i had a class with most of the cheer team the other day, and they don't- they don't think of you as a good person... romantically" i look away thinking if that made sense. i don't think it did

johnny sighed. "what?"he asked absently running a hand through his hair.

"out of twenty girls on the cheer team, you've been with twelve of them. only... only one of them got a second date"

johnny awkwardly laughs, "fuckkk" he mumbles while i shift in his lap.

"well this is coming back to bite me in the ass."

"i guess they made me think of me and you... will you ditch me when you get bored of me or get what you want, just like all the other girls?"
he sees the sadness in my eyes.

"oh fuck" johnny sighs "no. of course not."

"please don't think that" he looks up at me

that was all i needed to hear.

"ok" i mumble in the softest voice he'd ever hear me use.

talking about the future is hard when we don't even know what we're doing in the present.

carefully, slowly, johnny wrapping his arms around me. i exhaled and smiled softly, tucking my head in his chest. i feel him kiss the top of my head.

"you know i love you, right kenz?" johnny asks me quietly.

"shut up" i whisper.

for the rest of the day, we layed around beside eachother. we had a conversation about how johnny's parents want to see me again. i was really confused on why so suddenly, but i remember how sweet they are and i agreed.

i'm going tomorrow night. i need to make a good impression since me and johnny are somewhat of an item. not officially, he hasn't asked me yet.

🍃