30 : Nothing's well in farewell

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30.

Nothing’s well in farewell

Agatha

 

They say things happen for a reason. At first I thought it was pure bullshit. I thought the person who coined that phrase was a downright hypocrite, but seeing how things turned out for me, its safe to say that thing does really happen for a reason.

What ifs.

Yeah those annoying what ifs are bugging me again.

What if I was never sick?

I would have a normal life.

What if I had a normal life?

Well that only means,

No Reema.

No Javi.

No Trent.

No Kuya Leo.

And most of all I wouldn’t get to have this one great love.

If I wasn’t sent to this hospital to begin with, Cooper and I wouldn’t have even met and I’m pretty sure, a life without Cooper sucks. Yes I could live without this idiotic guy but life just isnt the same. Life without Cooper is Empty. Actually, emptier than an empty box of emptiness.

Well there’s a lot of possibilities, but one thing’s for sure, kahit na ano man ang naging buhay ko, siguradong  mahal na mahal parin ako ng pamilya ko.

“Ate galingan mo! Matatalo ka na!” Sigaw ng sigaw si Ponzi kaya natawa na lamang ako.

Here I am playing video games with my little brother, he’s winning against me since hindi ako makapaglaro ng maayos dahil sa dextrose na nakakabit parin sa akin.  But kahit wala akong kalaban-laban, he’s still cheering for me and mukhang magpapatalo pa siya. Cute kid. I hope he grows up to be a good guy. I hope he gets to experience a great love. I hope hindi siya magaya kay Cooper na nagmahal ng babaeng may deadline na.

“You’re weird.” Aniya habang tumatawa patuloy sa pagpindot ng hawak na joystick.

“But pretty.” Biro ko.

“You’re not going to leave again right?” Tanong niya ulit habang hindi itinatanggal ang mga mata niya mula sa monitor.

Ponzi is only 8. He doesn’t understand things but I want him to be aware of how cruel life gets.  I want him to be aware para hindi siya magaya sa akin na labis na nahirapan. Atleast he’ll be prepared of what could happen.

“I’ll leave someday kiddo. Everybody does. But everybody loves too.” I confessed making him pause the game we’re playing.

Ibinaba niya ang hawak na joystick at kunot-noong napatingin sakin.

“Don’t leave. Mom and Dad will cry again.” Aniya kaya napakagat ako sa labi ko at pinilit na lamang ang sarili kong ngumiti.

“Kaya wag mo akong gayahin okay? Never leave mom and dad. Never make them cry. Promise me that okay?” Itinaas ko ang pinky finger ko.

“Okay.” He said as both of our pinky fingers intertwined.

“Nga pala,” I reached for the ipod na nakapatong lamang sa bedside table ko. Ilang linggo na ako dito sa bahay namin pero ngayon ko lang naalalang ibigay to sa kanya.

Stay awake, Agatha (PUBLISHED UNDER PSICOM)Tahanan ng mga kuwento. Tumuklas ngayon